I don’t think it’s enough… we need different kind of love at different ages in our life in different ratios one can’t take the place of another… 
 Just my POV

Expert

Software Engineer

How much do you care about the world? 
 A lot. I live here bruh. 
  
 If you mean about fellow people? 
 Not much tbh

Founder

Trust me, I know what made you sad... But for a very specific reason I have done this selection for 3rd word of my heading...

Software Developer

Consultant

It depends upon human to human! I have became introvert, but I like to contribute for greater good of society. If i dont like certain people, I would love to care for animals. If you have energy to give you will find ways.

Tech lead

No one would love you as your parents do. Not even your partner or kids. Learn to live with it

I care too much to be honest. I know I haven’t received love properly in my life that does not mean entire world is all bad people.  
  
 But having been raised by an angel of a grandmother 👵 bless her soul . I have come to know that everyone has a purpose in life.  
  
 I have come to know that my purpose in my life is my family.  I am nothing without my wife and kids. You won’t hear another post from me without them.

Project manager

Also the very same point which makes me happy. That they protect me, fight for me, cry for me, be proud of me.

I like to believe that there are few aside from my parents that care about me but I don't have a GF if that's what you are looking for. Anyhow, if you are asking how I feel, I am good and living it. I have my ups and downs but mostly focused on work. I do that because I am just living it, not happy or sad. I do what I want and have fun with the boys but I don't have anyone to share the same with, nothing to live for aside from my parents. No real purpose or clear direction. 

The best way that I can describe it is "If God gives me a choice to live, the remaining 80 years as-is VS 1 year with all the happiness that I would have experienced in the 80 years". I might go with the latter option and be done with it. That is not to say I hate my life and want to end it. I would rather get it over with and not savor the moment.

Nailed the question through the heart. I care for my 2 friends which i meet every weekend. Some friends(~4)/ acquaintance who live outside of town and my close relatives. I dont care much of the world. I tried to make friends everywhere like the gym and meetup but failed mostly. So i dont care much about the world. It just feels that everything is superficial. Also i never had a gf.

To all men who have never ever been loved by anyone else except their parents...

To all men who have never ever been loved by anyone else except their parents...- Grapevine

I'm 21 m. Had a 9 months old relationship with a girl who's 6 months older. It was the best 9 months of my life. We connected on so many levels that I never thought would happen with me at such a young age. 

Recently, she broke up with me. It was not our mistake. Her mother isn't well (from a long time, and I knew that) and her last wish is to see her daughter getting married. 

Forcefully, she had to admit this and told me everything. And told me that we need to end this. 

It's been 3 weeks, and there's minimal contact between us. 

I'm a final year college student, not getting placements, too much pressure from family. I can't think about anything. Feels like all of this is eating me up. We had very secure future plans, but everything is over now. I don't know what to do. 

I try very hard to stay on track, but her thoughts are eating me up. I've started meditation, therapy and everything, but nothing is working the way I thought it would do. 

She was the one that gave me assurance that everything will be fine. Her presence was the most peaceful thing I had, but now, there's nothing. 

Help me, please. 

PS: please don't judge me the way I am. I'm trying to be normal as much as possible but nothing's working.

Need urgent help.

I have been a little caught up with numerous things in my life lately and have finally found some free time to open up myself to new experiences. 

I had a wishlist of shows and movies that I wanted to watch but as soon as I start watching them, I get bored and feel like turning it off. 

No, its not the content
No, its not the genre
No, its not the actors
No, its not the taste either

This is pretty ironic as considering the fact that I have spent a fair share of my youth chasing academics and career, my heart had always craved for life experiences. I had to let go of the woman I loved simply because I was too focussed on my JEE. I wont be able to forgive myself for that EVER. It almost felt like I had lost a limb, without which , I would be rendered disfunctional. Thats a separate story tho.

Nothing excites me (yep nothing)
Nothing amuses me 
Nothing feels lively

I have no clue where my life is headed

I understand that as we age, our triggers of happiness change. I have put concious efforts into knowing what those new triggers are. But I cant find any plausible sources of happiness.

I am performing pretty well with my career.
Even got a double digit hike.
But didnt feel that kick of joy.

Have I approached a dead end?

Losing Interest In New Things

Data engineer

Welcome to Office Gossip's Private Community

Women of grapevine, if you had to share one advice with your younger self what would it be?

Human resources

Grapeviners, can you, with all honesty convince a non-believer like me into getting married and having children. If you do, my parents will send a million blessings your way. 

About me: 
- Female, 28
- mostly introverted, very selectively extroverted
- single and normally attractive
- Jinxed when it comes to relationships
- Financially independent, Net worth: 1 cr
- not bragging, but I'm decently intellectual and I can have smart conversations

My reason to resist marriage is: I'm scared it won't work out and will cause bigger problems than being single. Have seen too many unhappy marriages in family and friends. Dating scenes in recent times have only made things even more unimpressive.

Convince me to get married

After a few failed relationships, I had an arranged marriage (at that time, it was just to fulfill what my parents wanted). She was a very conventional girl,, never had any relationship before. I was scared going into the marriage too. 
  
 5 years later, she is the best thing that has happened to me. She helped me explore things I never would have. She gave my life a different perspective. 
  
 I'm not saying just because it happened to me, it could happen to you too. I'm saying unless you take the leap you'll never know what you're missing out on.

Welcome to Software Engineers's Private Community

It's not restricted to over 30 women. Open to all the women here irrespective of their age.

From career to health, marriage , relationship, travel, goals. #Learn from experiences

Women of GV. Hope to learn from you

Is it just me or is even a job at the best Tech companies just don’t make any sense for women? 

There are always women who have great family support or husbands that are understanding and encouraging. But generally why does it seem like becoming a senior woman in tech even at the best places is sort of unattractive and significantly increases your odds of “failure” outside of work e.g. divorce,having kids late? 

Interested for thoughts from both men and women.

27F Engineer: Software Engineering Not Worth It For Women?

Hmm, someone I know has more than 10+ patents(ex-broadcom), is a tech evangelist and an implementation advisor for a cloud tech, have 3 kids with fourth on the way. Sometimes you just need a supportive environment.

Product Manager

Burdened, burned out, hard working, sensitive and ever running men are always taken for granted. Most men don't express their loneliness due to social constructs. What do you think? Does anyone even care about male loneliness?

Does anyone even care ?

Welcome to Business Roles's Private Community

Hey All, I am writing this to express how I am feeling since last 1 year now. This post will be a bit lengthy but I would be grateful if anyone could help me even a bit. 
I moved into a new company 1year back and due to bad work environment I left. I took a months break and joined a new company now. I have a total 5 years of work experience, my salary is extremely good. ( I don’t worry about this at all for now)

My problem is I don’t know what to do in my life. I guess I have quarter life crisis. 

Earlier I wanted to do music and act , I took professional classes and left because I felt bored idk why. I felt like I need someone to guide me and handhold me since I know no one in this industry. 
Talking about my job I have always moved into roles I loved every bit of work and I m very sincere and hardworking. 
I stopped working out , I stopped cycling, I stopped painting.
I stopped liking everything literally. Idk how to get back at things. I feel I am gonna die anyway why I need to do this , or that or etc etc. I even took counselling but it did not seem yo help me. 

Idk what to do. Please share your experiences too and what I need to do.

Mentally not well!

Market research

I always looked at her and felt she is so beautiful, charismatic, and had an infectious smile. Looking at her made me smile broo.

Chapter 1
One day I decided to ask her out. I messaged her and our conversation grew then she spilled out that she also liked me a lot. And she was glad that I asked her out.

Chapter 2
She had studied in an all girls school and she had a stereotype about boys that they are all stupid and bad. And girls and boys should never be together. I was fine because atleast she liked me 😂. One fine day she asked me to break up with my brosss. I asked her why?
She said your friends are all playboys and I don't like the way they look at me. (Disclaimer: My bros are really nicest guys and I have known them since childhood they are the best gentlemen). We had an argument which didn't end on a good note.


Chapter 3
I left to a new state for my Job. After I reached there she messaged me that we can't talk and we have to stop whatever we had. I got anxious and worried and spent my 5 months not being able to contact her. I got into depression. Then me being restless on my birthday I came back to my hometown. At exactly 11:59PM when my bday was going to end she messaged me "Happy Birthday". I was so happy to see her message.

Chapter 4
We started talking and she said that she is leaving to Canada for her higher studies. I was happy for her but at the same time I was sad. I didn't want to see her go. We both cried and stayed on call till morning watching each other sleep.

Chapter 5:
She reached Canada and she completed her formalities and procedures. We talked for few more days but then eventually she started giving me hints that she is not interested. Then one day she abruptly messaged me and said we can't talk and we have to end everything. I cried the whole night, because there was no way for me to contact her and she had blocked me.

Chapter 6:
It has been 1 yr to that day. Somehow I have gone numb. I'm slowly forgetting her.

She left me.

Chill. After 5-6 years you will laugh on yourself that why in the world you gave so much importance to her. There is no derth of good women in this world. Moving her away was god's plan, for your good that you might never understand. Take Care!

It’s easy to fall prey to negativity and gossip. In that we may lose sight of the good we have in our lives. Let’s take a moment to acknowledge and be grateful for that once in a while. Here goes mine -

I’m grateful that I find joy in learning and discovering new things. I like reading and knowing about so many different things for no reason. 

What are you grateful for?

What are you grateful for?

Growth manager

In the morning, my brother shouted at mom and me. 
It was a classic case of expectations mismatch, but this really pissed me. Though mom continued to be her sweet self.
Later in the day, he hurt himself (nothing serious), and my first thought was Karma works fast 😏
But parents were frantically looking up remedies, calling doctor and getting medicine prescription on Whatsapp (today being weekend + festival, it was even difficult)

That also reminded me of the countless times I have been an asshole to them. 
Had they thought like me, I would have been out of the house way back 🫠

Cannot say these to them, lest they get any ideas 😭 but Grateful!

Parents and their unconditional love

I found an old form from 2013, my father had sent details
Annual Income - 8L
Education expense - 2.5L

He is retired govt empl so couldn't lie on numbers

I was in top autonomous institute, and my brother in good private school in Delhi

It hits me now, how I wasted my life 'enjoying college' and thereafter
Falling in and out of love

Parents never say anything on practical topics, just regular wake up early, eat vegetables rant

I fucked my life and how

Dying in guilt

There’s a lot of time for you too do what you wish to do. Guilt and regret are temporary, your actions are kinda more important. 
  
 We will always disappoint our people as every person is different. You did what you felt gave you happiness at that point. Don’t be hard on yourself. 
  
 Your parents will eventually be the happiest when they see you chasing your dreams and goals. Don’t regret anything. Just take it one day at a time and do what feels right. 
  
 Cheer!

Brand Communication Manager

There's was another Dutch lady in the news who decided to end her life in a similar manner in Jan'24. She was also 28.
There's a famous YouTuber called Physics Girl who's suffering from Long covid for a year now. 

I don't know what's the appropriate response here. Has anyone witnessed people with Long covid symptoms? Does it warrant taking your life at such a young age?

TW - Euthanasia

Business analyst

It's for the people who stay away from their parents for work.

How do you deal with this guilt of leaving your parents behind when they need you the most? Also, if you have done something regarding this, please mention.

Guilt of staying away from ageing parents

I grew up with 5 sisters (1 real and 4 cousin), I am aware about the pain and the tribulation that women go through and have always been supporting women in general.

I was shocked to see the opposite when I stepped into the real world. Most women whom I have met have only disposed me after using my resources. Be it a friend or even a prospective gf. Even my lady therapist offered the same solution indirectly by saying that things work differently for men.

I have always responded to their rants and have comforted them.  But when it was my chance to vent out, they were like YOU ARE A MAN YOU SHOULDNT BE BOTHERED BY MENTAL ISSUES, FOCUS ON YOUR WORK. 


I feel bottled up and sometimes end up breaking down. These are the people I have been knowing for ages. The other day I randomly started slapping myself for no reason in the washroom. I dont feel like I am being heard. I dont want such a life where I am being left alone for feeling the same things a woman would feel. 

I feel that the only thing I am good for is making money. Afterall, thats what men are supposed to be. This is a punishment for breaking my mould and I accept that.

I have been very empathetic so far. NEVER AGAIN. I love myself and only myfuckingself nowww.

There is this book called "Men are from jupiter Women are from venus" which clearly states that when women are in misery, make them feel heard. And when men are in misery, leave them alone. QUEEN , RATHER PLS K!LL US ALREADY. 

Why are kind men being subjected to the punishment which bad men (rapist, dowryfreaks, cheaters) deserve? Why do I see bad men getting so much attention and respect? Why are we still adulating Ranbir Kapoor's charachter for cheating on Rashmika just coz Tripti was attractive? 


Being emotional is such a curse for men !


Dear men, 
Please focus on your LPA and provide for your parents, future wife ,and kids, and when youre old enough, JUST ROT AND D!E. The moment you dont, you will be treated like hell.

(Rant) Why are most women least bothered about men's mental health ?

Welcome to Personal Finance's Private Community

DINKs, (dual income no kids) have been gaining traction a lot lately. I want to know from the members of gravevine, what are their views on being a DINK couple or a DINKWAD( double income no kids with a dog). From financial prospects like having a huge disposable income to emotional aspects like not having a legacy or going against custom Indian tradition. Do share your thoughts 🤔💭

What are your thoughts about being DINKS?

We are a DINK couple (live-in, will get married soon) and absolutely no plans to have kids. Maybe be a DINKWAD someday by adopting an indie. Also no plans to buy a home or spend on our marriage. This is not a financial decision (both of us are doing decently well in our careers) but we don't want to have a child knowing how nothing around is improving and we don't want to sacrifice the best years of our lives by doing this. We are building a large corpus to be financially independent and travel without any financial restrictions.

Growth Manager

What is a belief you held strongly in your youth that you have since changed your mind about?

Have you come across westerners celebrating parenthood, respecting the fact that kids chose them as parents.
For culture, where sex is comparatively easily accessible - they consider parenting great responsibility 

Whereas in our country, half the country had babies because their families wouldn’t stop pestering 'to settle'
Kids are born with the responsibility of taking 'care'
For a place with not-so-great infrastructure, people should really use protection more.

Parenting

If we open up to girls about our feelings, we either be ridiculed or weak but if girls open up there is a whole community supporting them!!

Even if it's men's mental health month, are there any open talks or girls helping out??? NOPE

WE CAN EITHER SHUT UP AND LOCK IN OUR INTEGRITY OR SHARE OUR THOUGHTS TO THEM....


Convince me! 

Ps: no fights just a post to look out to talk with girls🥴

To all men who have never ever been loved by anyone else except their parents...

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