Fly economy

Disclaimer: This post is purely for comedic purposes. No actual spoons, pens, yoga pants, or billionaires were harmed in the making of this joke. "BAR"ring one.

So you know you've made it in life and moment marketing game - when you get arrested, and your own app is trending with memes about you.

See - Pavel Durov lands in France thinking croissants, la beauté, la café, free wifi and boom the French police arrest him. Why? Because some people used Telegram for shady stuff from terrorism to drug trafficking. And everyone is like - sure, let’s blame the guy who made the app.

That’s like suing the guy who invented the spoon because you got fat That's like blaming the tupperware guy cause someone hid weed in a lunchbox That's like going after the inventor of the camera because your ex found out you were cheating through a selfie Even better - Go after the inventor of the pen because someone wrote a death threat? Or go after the person who invented yoga pants because your butt didn't look like that Instagram model?

And then Macron’s out here with his "this isn’t political" speech. Sure, because nothing says "we’re not making a statement" like arresting a billionaire in broad daylight. Meanwhile, Russia’s sulking in the corner like - Hey! We wanted to do that first. And the UAE’s just sitting back saying - Listen, We don’t arrest people. We just deport them. It’s less paperwork.

If you’re a billionaire tech mogul, and you’re not getting arrested at least once, are you even doing it right? Durov’s most likely just taking his billionaire world tour with a bonus stop in French jail. Probably sitting there with a croissant in one hand, his phone in the other, scrolling through Telegram thinking - damn - this meme thing is really fun.

So what's the real lesson here? If you're gonna run a messaging app that prides itself on free speech, maybe don’t fly private. Stick to economy class. And remember, in today’s world, you don’t need a TV show to get famous - you just need a private jet, a controversial app, and the willingness to get arrested on foreign soil.