Accomplishments in life

You are 35. What have you stopped believing in that you totally believed in when you were 25?

I turned 30 last month and I still feel i am a 20 year old. I lost the last 4 years of my life working from home and have started to go to office recently. I never worked together in a team, never been out for team lunches/dinners, never presented my work to the seniors/leadership. I have 4.5 years experience on the paper and my interaction with colleagues in person has been almost zero . I don’t know how to do my taxes, can’t do basic servicing of my bike, extremely indiscipline’s, rarely track my expenses, can’t say ‘No’, haven’t upskill we and hence stuck in TCS, can’t stick to a hobby or interest, pathetic in managing my time, have no sense of punctuality, socially awakened, overweight with a pot belly and hence have confidence issues, can’t take care of myself in terms of self grooming, couldn’t maintain friendships as I used to get offended when someone made fun of me or mocked me- my inflated ego is just useless. I can’t control my emotions, I sometimes get emotional and have tears in my eyes, I show emotions easily on my face, not smart when it comes to dealing with others, don’t know how much to talk to whom, whom to talk to, how to talk to and when to talk. I’ve been told I’m pessimistic and highly negative about myself but I’m just saying things the way it is. I have no responsibilities on life. I’ll be getting married the next year and I know I can take up the responsibility. But I still have the fear of putting my fiancé down. I love her a lot and I never even would do anything to put her down. My bad time management skills, inability to focus, getting distracted badly, being a slow learner, not networking, not having idea on making switches regularly, being too lazy and impatient to learn new things, not being updated in terms of on demand skills, tools , technologies, reluctance to learn something new and hence staying in comfort zone has screwed up my career. I feel stuck and lost in life. I honestly don’t know what to do.

My overall education started a bit late than normal people due to my fathers transfers and school admission rules. Consequently when I applied for JEE Advanced back in 2017 i was 19.5 years old. I got it but wasnt satisfied so dropped a year and got a better rank. I was 20.5 years old when I finally joined IIT. Somewhere subconciously throughout my college life i felt that I did achieve what I wanted to but really late. I know theres nothing I could do about it but this was something still killing me inside. Most of my batchmates where 18 year olds and even the ones who dropped where at most 19. I always wanted to pursue my masters and phd but somewhere at the back of my mind I feel I would have to go theough the same feelings again. It just kills me so much inside. Currently I have completed 2 years as a software engineer and I am 26 years old. On one part my mind tells me that I am made for much more than just an IT job and should go to academia. On the other hand it feels like I am too old for it. I dont know what to do. I am not able to rationalize my thoughts. I am not able to understand how can I bring myself to overcome my fears and achieve what i really want in life.

/s [ also hoping to have some responses from people in their 30s & 40s for insights ] pls don’t say boards dene ki jagah crypto kharidna tha 2014 me🫠

Stages of Life: 1. You’re at School and Grades are everything. 2. You get to college and your GPA is everything. 3. You get to your first job and your pay is everything. 4. You get to the end of the year and Performance Review is everything. So, essentially at every moment in your life, you’re judged by a number. My heart goes out to all those who failed at being better at this. But, I really cry for my brethren who succeeded at this hustle, for the person you’ve become. Drop your experiences down below. I’m just in a very mellow mood after work, contemplating about life’s weird quirks.

I have been in this industry for 4 years now and there is not a single day that i hated this place any less. Today 9th August 2023 i am all alone in my room thinking to myself about what’s the point of this? I have no life i am all alone and tbh i have no real friends. A few of them that i do have are so far away from me busy in their life. No love life no social life. At 27 i feel wasted, done, finished let me clarify not in a suicidal way. I just feel exhausted my body is breaking down by the day i feel. I am just broken at this point and feel like quitting this profession altogether. I just don’t feel happy. The more i work the more irritated and frustrated i get. To top all that i have no one to share my emotions with here. Call it whatever you may wanna call a cry for help, a rant or nonsense. I am at that point where every morning feels like punishment. Every night that i go to bed i try to stay positive but i am not able to. I just hate everything. I am not a lazy man i work for 10-12 hours everyday and i think now that has finally got to me as i feel finished. I don’t know if anyone will read it or not i just wanted to reach out to people or anyone who feels like me. Broken tired and just done with everything.

I am a 25 yr old male and I come from a very small town in Jharkhand. My dad was a mechanic. I am their only son. I graduated from a tier 3 college where getting any job was a dream. I worked hard and cleared a 9 LPA job in Pune. Got promoted and got hikes and came to around 13 LPA in around a year’s time. Resigned it for Amazon, BLR at 30 LPA. I joined in Oct 22 and got laid off in Jan 23. When I cleared Amazon, it was moment of pride for me and my parents. For the first time everything looked well and life felt happy and promising. It was just perfect. After the layoff, life has been full of struggle. It was so difficult to get a job. Somehow got a decent company who would at least hire me without reducing my pay, but had to deal with a pathetic manager, and the culture wasn’t too good. Joined here for ~34 LPA I finished 1 year in this company this April and I started to interview. Started with a startup, they said they can’t offer that much. Next was MSFT. They took 8 ROUNDS for a SE2 role and they offered me a L60 role and won’t budge at all, for a lower comp. I had to reject. In the meantime, I had already cleared Intuit at 50 LPA and DE Shaw at around 60 LPA. DE Shaw HM told me this role is SDET which the recruiter didn’t mention. Had to reject there. I resigned after I cleared Intuit and expected MSFT to give me an offer and I was sure that whatever comp they’ll offer I’ll take, but didn’t expect them to give me L60 and a comp around 29 LPA. When Intuit’s joining came close I considered taking my resignation back but my manger bullied me and didn’t take my resignation back. I got a chance to interview with Apple. It was so close to Intuit’s joining date that I asked Intuit to push it by 3 weeks. After 5 rounds, Apple said they can’t go ahead with my profile because of less experience. Folks trust me: All my interviews at MSFT and Apple went very very well. When I made up my mind to join Intuit, they announced lay offs. My only option is to join.

I have been a little caught up with numerous things in my life lately and have finally found some free time to open up myself to new experiences. I had a wishlist of shows and movies that I wanted to watch but as soon as I start watching them, I get bored and feel like turning it off. No, its not the content No, its not the genre No, its not the actors No, its not the taste either This is pretty ironic as considering the fact that I have spent a fair share of my youth chasing academics and career, my heart had always craved for life experiences. I had to let go of the woman I loved simply because I was too focussed on my JEE. I wont be able to forgive myself for that EVER. It almost felt like I had lost a limb, without which , I would be rendered disfunctional. Thats a separate story tho. Nothing excites me (yep nothing) Nothing amuses me Nothing feels lively I have no clue where my life is headed I understand that as we age, our triggers of happiness change. I have put concious efforts into knowing what those new triggers are. But I cant find any plausible sources of happiness. I am performing pretty well with my career. Even got a double digit hike. But didnt feel that kick of joy. Have I approached a dead end?

It can be anything related to not doing something you always wanted to but never did, a mistake you realize you shouldn’t have made, or feelings of not being successful enough. Feel free to share your thoughts.

I am 23M working in a well renowned Fintech startup. Have got what I have dreamed of in college like high ownership, good pay and other similar things. But lately realized that I can't do these things for my majority of life. Although I enjoy my work but still feeling lonely and aimless. Previous to September it was remote but now they have made it hybrid and I have to reallocate to Gurgaon and now I am feeling more lonely and aimless in life. Have tried travelling and other stuffs inorder to find interest in life but nothing excites me.