If your manager used you as a scapegoat in a situation, would you still continue in the job?
So, my friend wanted to take up task with other team, his manager didn't want it. So the manager took him among the other team members and publicly humiliated him showcasing that he is worried as fuck about the task in hand(he was just excited) and that they are putting pressure on him(they weren't)
I started thinking, if this happened with me, I don't have a comeback, but I wouldn't wanna stay with a manager who uses his own people to get ahead. Would you?
From what I understand is the manager had crossed his line. I would definitely not run away from this job because that would mean I am running away from the problem, rather than solving the problem.
If I were that affected employee, here’s how I would’ve approached.
Is the manager a repeated offender?
If yes, I would find his weaknesses and make him taste his own medicine. There’s nothing unethical about faking your job to project the way the manager understands, yet working for your own principles under the hood. Indirectly you’re doing good to both you and your company. It comes with practice.
If no, then I would be more direct to the manager & express my feelings asking him to show respect.
Think like this. Your failure is your manager’s failure. If you keep failing every time, what is your manager doing all these days? Keep failing at his own capacity?
PS: I have myself faced humiliation in a subtle way at different times of my career. The definition of humiliation is subjective and differs from person to person. I generally make that black-and-white when I have my 1x1s with my manager.
Thanks a lot for the response @Coolgoose. I believe my friend did have 1:1 with the manager. But it's just in his nature to talk rubbish sometimes. He's a repeat offender!
I suggested that he switch though. Why not switch though?
My reasoning -
No matter what, what manager says is final! Others have taken acceptance towards it, but if he picks a fight with him with tit for tat, his life would be miserable. And if I was in his place, I would've lost respect for this manager and would've left.
If you cannot stand for your teammates that's one thing. That's also not right for me, but to actually use your own teammate as a scapegoat, I would've not stayed a second more. It speaks volumes about the person and what he is capable of!
There are enough number of managers like this in every organization. Switching your job to land in to another pair of hands that’s even more atrocious, would not make your life any easier. This is a corporate game.
Secondly, losing your respect toward your manager doesn’t mean you lose respect for the role. I might even criticize the role, the person, but I will still have the respect for the role.
People simply abuse this role making it look like some kind of an atrocity. If you simply react to such situations & take decisions in haste, you are doing no good. If you’re really capable of surviving in this corporate game, you must find ways to show mirror to such people. If you won’t do, nobody will. It’s analogous to “Who’ll bell the cat?”.