Is there a chance to change behaviour of abusive spouse? Pls share anything that helped

Generally works, sometimes backfires.
Jokes aside, IMHO, you have to understand where the abuse is coming from ? Whether person had

• abusive childhood, perhaps abusive parents or one parent was abusive toward another? In this case the abuser was a victim now it's part of their behavioural pattern..
• natural psychopathic tendencies: need clinical psychological intervention, beyond your control. In all cases , you should protect yourself at all costs. Talk to your closest friends and relatives, who have wisdom not just anyone.
• after this talk to your partner, let them know how you feel, if abuse is physical, make sure you are not alone with the spouse.
• you have to draw the line, let them understand that this kind of behaviour will not go on, and you have to understand, if you don't stop them, it's only going to get worse.
• if talk doesn't work , the next step is intervention, ask relatives, friends to step in for intervention, Google how to conduct an intervention.
• if this doesn't help, idk, it's up to you, part ways, keep trying, consult a therapist or something.
  I wish you the best Stay strong

He thinks I dont respect him when I question him. He wants me to be submissive like his mother and bear all the verbal abuse. He wants his own space where he can just be with the kid only to play(no responsibility )and doesn’t want me around

Depends. You might need to seek help from a marriage counsellor

Just going to be honest, it won’t go away it always stays, what helps is for the person facing the abuse is t take a strong stand how ever difficult it is and make it clear