DancingMochi

Is this okay?

My manager is making thinly veiled threats about me taking all my allowed leaves.

He took me on a 1:1 today and told me that I took too many leaves last year. Then he said that the leadership is concerned about this and added that while I can take more leaves if I want to, it won't be good for me. He then brought up my promotion. It felt like he was using a pending promotion to stop me from taking more leaves.

Not sure what I should do. Is this even normal in corporate? I thought our leaves are ours to take but now I'm guilty to take a PTO even for genuine reasons.

23mo ago

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DizzyMuffin

American Express23mo

Leaves are part of your compensation. It’s your right to take them. And it’s on them to approve those.

DancingMochi

American Express23mo

He approves all of them. He has to. The problem is he makes me so guilty about taking them, and a shit ton of anxiety about my career progression (by constantly bringing my promotion into discussion when I want to take leaves).

DizzyMuffin

American Express23mo

He’s being an asshole, and you need to bring it up to Colleague Experience Group / the HR.

SwirlyQuokka

Google23mo

This is typical toxic behaviour in my experience. How long have you been under him?

If he's getting into a habit of threatening you with leaves, leadership name drops, promotions it's not going to stop until you become compliant to his word completely.

DancingMochi

American Express23mo

For about 8 months now.

I'm still not sure if it's actually the leadership or just him. Because if it's rotten from the top I can't even escalate. :/

DizzyMuffin

American Express23mo

Fret not. It’s not rotten from the top. Amex is very considerate about colleague behaviour. Stuff like this won’t be tolerated.

If all else fails, call the Amex Ethics hotline and let them know.

BubblyDonut

Dream 1123mo

Bring it up with HR

QuirkyPotato

Stealth23mo

Sure it's your right to take leaves. But your company culture (i.e your boss and probably his boss) seems to reward face time in the office.

Forgot about your rights, it's whether or not you think you can thrive in that culture or not in the long term.

DancingMochi

American Express23mo

You're right. And I've decided I can't. Planning to switch teams now...

DancingCupcake

Stealth23mo

Don’t worry, just take your leaves. He is hoping that you take his threats, because if you choose to take your leaves, there is nothing he can do. Will fume for a few days, lick his wounds and wait in lay. But guys like that do that to everyone who they can do and get away with. So ignore

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