DINKs, (dual income no kids) have been gaining traction a lot lately. I want to know from the members of gravevine, what are their views on being a DINK couple or a DINKWAD( double income no kids with a dog). From financial prospects like having a huge disposable income to emotional aspects like not having a legacy or going against custom Indian tradition. Do share your thoughts š¤š
We are a DINK couple (live-in, will get married soon) and absolutely no plans to have kids. Maybe be a DINKWAD someday by adopting an indie. Also no plans to buy a home or spend on our marriage. This is not a financial decision (both of us are doing decently well in our careers) but we don't want to have a child knowing how nothing around is improving and we don't want to sacrifice the best years of our lives by doing this. We are building a large corpus to be financially independent and travel without any financial restrictions.
Thousands of my ancestors didn't survive through battles, famines, nature's wrath and what not just so that I can save money by not having kids and buy Apple and Belenciaga products or have a instagramable vacation in Bali. Blood flowing through me means "something". You live through your kids, pass on your being through them. Sad that we live in a society where not having kids is considered practical decision.
But why assume that the kids will turn out to be great ? I see a lot of old couples abandoned by their kids, rich or poor doesn't matter here. A poor guy kicks out his parents at a railway station in India, while a rich guy abandons his retired parents by settling abroad, and hears stories where neighbours do the last rite. Having no kids would save one from such perils in life
Nightmare for the world. If its the urban intellectually bit off population decide to not have kids. A famous British video on this exists. See a lot of people CF lately.
Who wants to bring life on a planet that is kinda doomed with global warming and overpopulation? Won't it be better to depopulate?
Doomerism this is. Nothing is doomed. Its very near sighted off us or perhaps stupid propoganda to make anyone think otherwise. Life is good. And it will only be better. And the only way human kind can thrive in centuries to come is if the right people also reproduce.
Yes there are bad things happening in the world. They always happened, and they were worse before.
What is wrong with not having kids? Of course deep inside, majority of us don't appreciate our parenting.
Our parents had us because they felt lonely, they didn't have the balls to achieve their dreams, they thought the only way to keep their dreams alive is to give birth to us and pass on their dream to us, and the fact that giving birth to children is the only affordable way to immortality in a genetic sense.
Remember kids, majority of parents give birth to their children out of desperation to fulfill their agenda, biological or otherwise.
If we weren't born, we wouldn't have to deal with all this bullshit of eating, drinking, shitting, pissing and fucking.
Not being born>Being born as a dog in Ambani's house>being born as a human in Ambani's home
I feel really sad for you and your scarred childhood. Get therapy anon.
It's a simple thought, only if people understood
We flipped.
Iām 40 and my wife is 37 - we decided to have a baby this year. We are now pregnant with twins :)
There is no logic. Totally a change of heart. We lived our life and never planned to have kids but just felt empty last couple of years - everytime we see a baby in stroller or in the part we would stop and talk to the baby.
I had big beard last year and the baby cried after looking at me. My wife blamed it on my beard and made me shave :-/ just sharing level of infatuation she developed for babies all of a sudden. I flipped after her because she was so happy. It was a ow transition and we kept denying it till the day we couldnt. Perhaps we ok financially and not as busy now as we were last 15 years (married 13 years)
So we know we are going to be older parents -luckily both of us are fit (no kids so far = gym 5 days a week). We are absolutely excited and cant wait for babies. Btw I forgot to mention - twins - 1 girl and 1 boy š¤©
My learning; there is no logic. Could have been more planned. Could have been just 1 baby. Think we got lucky. Could have been no kids ever - our change of heart was so fickle. Doesnt matter what you decide - just make sure you are actually (not intellectually) excited with whatever life choices you make.
This is the answer I was looking for.
But I got a question for you. What if both of you had decided not to have kids when you got married. Then one person flipped and the other didn't. What then? What if your SO is extremely excited about it but you are not?
I am guessing it's impossible to figure this out before it happens.
I'm curious (if you're in India) if you're pregnant with twins currently, how did you identify the gender? Is that legal?