Just Showing Up

Sometimes I feel that the work I am doing in the office is worthless. It is providing no value to the client nor does it help me. I am able to answer the technical questions of the client which help in their business decisions and I think that's what keeps me employed. But I still feel I am wasting my time and I really don't know what I should do. Does anyone else face a similar issue or is it only with me? Also have someone come out of this and would like to share their experiences.

Same as title. These days due to low job security and having faced layoff last year, I always feel the need to continuously do interview prep like DSA, LLD, etc even when I am not actively looking for a job. Plus, due to new technologies coming up, I feel the need to keep upskilling too. If I don't upskill or do interview prep continuously, I feel guilty as if I am wasting time. I feel like at this point, I am just living life to upskill and interview prep. Is there a way to balance all this along with work as it gets very tiring after a while and I feel burnt out?

I get a lot of work and sometimes I forget about everything else.

I'll set the context here. I was suppose to join a new organisation in the start of the year but it went on a hiring freeze immediately after my notice ended with my then employer. I ended up accepting the first offer that came my way. It was not of my desired profile but it was better than being jobless. Now, couple of months into the new job, I realize this is a very toxic place to be. Dormant founders only caring about money, rampant nepotism, no clear path for career growth. It is becoming difficult to sustain at this place. I've been trying but now I can feel my mental health dwindling because of it. I dread going to office everyday. But again, in this job market, atleast I have a job. The product role I mentioned is still on pipeline but no one knows when the freeze will end. My hiring manager and HR are pushing for my candidature (according to them) but management isn't allowing them to move ahead with new hires. Now my question is, should I quit my job and try finding my desire role (which seem like a humongous task) or stay put and wait for a offer to come and then leave my current employer? I'm torn. I dread going to office everyday. I don't know how much do I have it in me to keep continuing but I'm pushing my limits. Want some advice from fellow grapeviners here. TIA!

Everyday when i wake up there is a feeling of emptiness or a sad feeling just by the thought of going to work..earlier i used to think this will get better with time but no it doesn't..has anyone went through the same situation?? how to cope up with this??

At the risk of sounding weak, this has become more and more rampant with me. It feels as if I am living someone's elses life. Somedays I just feel like living a life thats pointless. These are the days when I feel very prone to these emotional impulses of sudden "lonlinesss" (despite having few of the most amazing people in my life) or "emptiness" or "anti-gratitude/self-destruction". So much mental lethargy behing these useless chain of thoughts. Am I the only one? Have I lost it? Am I sensitive? Is it a bad thing? Am I overworked? Am I too critical about my thoughts? Man this is so confounding.

So I left my job at one of the big 4s few months ago. Will discuss the reason some other time. But one of the issues I'm facing right now is that I never felt good in the corporate environment. Bosses shouting at you for your mistakes, you feel threatened to stand up against your own boss since they unfortunately have too much power. You need to take permission for leaves. People can be rude to you and you need to maintain your calm. The corporate politics. Then I left big 4 for some reasons. Took a short break. And now I'm working in one of the Indian firms. They have such policies that your TAT cannot be more than 5 minutes. You cannot log off before 8 pm. If you login after 5 minutes of the actual login time, then you would be marked as absent. Sometimes you're given deadlines which are very difficult to manage and hence you remain stressed out with your work. You don't have the freedom in your work and need to do everything as it has been told. So I don't really feel good in corporates. I feel there is too much pressure and it is just making me feel more and more sad. I don't feel myself anymore and I feel like a puppet. Does anyone else feel the same? How do I deal with this feeling? It scares me to think about how I have just started my career 3-4 years ago and need to work for the significant years of my life and I don't want to wake up and sleep with this feeling EVERYDAY. I think this is the first time I'm talking about it. If anyone would like to share their thoughts, or guide me regarding how do I feel better, or anything you feel I'm doing wrong and could be improved, then I'm all ears. Let's talk it out.

So I am working at a startup for around a year now. Everyday I see, it feels, what am I really doing? Where is the life headed? Doing bare minimum or doing your tasks and fucking off isn't enough. It's expected that we outgrow constantly, as if it's this work that we can always think about and nothing else. At the end, am wondering if it's still worth it? 1 day it feels that let's just quit it! Next day I feel, okay, I do want the money. I ain't looking for suggestions here, just wanted to see if anyone else felt this way