update on my last post, went to a therapist.

My current salary is 42LPA. I am from IIT, have 7 years of experience and work in product. Honestly, my value in the market is higher than what I’m being paid but I am very demotivated to optimise for that. When I do see less deserving people minting more money, I feel that I am doing injustice to myself and playing the wrong hand. More and more though, the thought of earning more money chokes me a bit. I have dreams of building something of my own - that gives me control to build something my way and freedom to live my life as per my terms. But the mindset of “zyada paisa pareshaani hai” doesn’t leave me. My family also is not dependent on me and whatever is needed from my side, I actively contribute to. I also lack any motivation to focus on my investments and see my money grow. I just have money sitting around in my bank account purely for nothing I also look at my lifestyle choices from time to time and go into existential debate of why we need the things that we do. This has come to a point where I really do not understand my relationship with money and why we earn and spend it. For me at this point, it’s just a show for the world. There’s very little that you need, and really no limit to what you want to show. And I just don’t see a point in it anymore.

THE POSITIVE SIDE: Sometimes you kinda eventually develop a soft corner for your therapist (especially if they belong to the opposite gender) due to the following pivotal reasons: 1. They are perhaps the only person you have who "listens" to you and helps you de-tanglenhour thoughts 2. Their tone is pacifying and welcoming. 3. Sometimes when you are venting out, you logical side of the brain takes the back seat and your emotions take over. During such conditions, you end up trusting someone if they are listening to you with an active interest. BUT BUT BUT ! THE APPARENT DARK SIDE: 1. They do all the sweet talk for money. While it may seem like a hard pill to swollow, its just like any other medical profession like cardiologist or radiologist, who wouldnt even look at you if you dont have money. 2. They will obviously judge you and talk about you to their close colleagues or intimate friends. 3. They would want you to BE SAD so that they can get paid. Infact my therapist once clearly said that we only take 20% accountability for everything when I was thanking her (indirectly hinting that if something goes wrong its on me and if something goes right its also on me) Thanks to my therapist I dont even trust my shadow anymore.

Hey All, I am writing this to express how I am feeling since last 1 year now. This post will be a bit lengthy but I would be grateful if anyone could help me even a bit. I moved into a new company 1year back and due to bad work environment I left. I took a months break and joined a new company now. I have a total 5 years of work experience, my salary is extremely good. ( I don’t worry about this at all for now) My problem is I don’t know what to do in my life. I guess I have quarter life crisis. Earlier I wanted to do music and act , I took professional classes and left because I felt bored idk why. I felt like I need someone to guide me and handhold me since I know no one in this industry. Talking about my job I have always moved into roles I loved every bit of work and I m very sincere and hardworking. I stopped working out , I stopped cycling, I stopped painting. I stopped liking everything literally. Idk how to get back at things. I feel I am gonna die anyway why I need to do this , or that or etc etc. I even took counselling but it did not seem yo help me. Idk what to do. Please share your experiences too and what I need to do.

Little background about myself. I am M in my early 30s, married with no kids yet. Professionally, I run a bootstrapped profitable business for 6+ years now. Since last 2-3 years I started having constant anxiety of health, work & family. I couldn't sleep nights constantly fearing the unknown & losing everything. With an increase in personal wealth, my mental health took a toll coz there is a constant internal & external pressure to maintain it & grow (still not recovered yet). Though I have no personal life problems, dad has a history of depression & takes medication for years. I didn't feel depressed hence avoided the medication but a friend suggested taking therapy, so here I am :) It's been 6-7 sessions & the situation has not improved but I understood a lot about the coping mechanism & perspective. It just changed my perspective towards work, stress, family & more. Even personal habits coz sleep was one of the big issues I brought up with the counsellor. 10/10 recommend going for therapy. [Also, have not mentioned all my issues here as I wanted to keep it short. Dm if you are struggling & need someone to talk to]

I turned 30 last month and I still feel i am a 20 year old. I lost the last 4 years of my life working from home and have started to go to office recently. I never worked together in a team, never been out for team lunches/dinners, never presented my work to the seniors/leadership. I have 4.5 years experience on the paper and my interaction with colleagues in person has been almost zero . I don’t know how to do my taxes, can’t do basic servicing of my bike, extremely indiscipline’s, rarely track my expenses, can’t say ‘No’, haven’t upskill we and hence stuck in TCS, can’t stick to a hobby or interest, pathetic in managing my time, have no sense of punctuality, socially awakened, overweight with a pot belly and hence have confidence issues, can’t take care of myself in terms of self grooming, couldn’t maintain friendships as I used to get offended when someone made fun of me or mocked me- my inflated ego is just useless. I can’t control my emotions, I sometimes get emotional and have tears in my eyes, I show emotions easily on my face, not smart when it comes to dealing with others, don’t know how much to talk to whom, whom to talk to, how to talk to and when to talk. I’ve been told I’m pessimistic and highly negative about myself but I’m just saying things the way it is. I have no responsibilities on life. I’ll be getting married the next year and I know I can take up the responsibility. But I still have the fear of putting my fiancé down. I love her a lot and I never even would do anything to put her down. My bad time management skills, inability to focus, getting distracted badly, being a slow learner, not networking, not having idea on making switches regularly, being too lazy and impatient to learn new things, not being updated in terms of on demand skills, tools , technologies, reluctance to learn something new and hence staying in comfort zone has screwed up my career. I feel stuck and lost in life. I honestly don’t know what to do.

So I might get some hate for this. I know this is weakness and the feedback I've gotten is toughen up. But I've never known how. Is there anyone else whose body and mind had accepted that they're not going to amount to anything but fought their way through it? Can you tell me your story? Or give me any book suggestions?

I am working as a senior product manager in a fintech startup. I am under a lot of stress due to work pressure, continuous badgering from business and tech stakeholders and loneliness. I always think of going home but staying in stressful job mainly because I don't want to be jobless. I can only post my views here anonymously because I don't want to be seen as loser. Request members if they can provide their suggestions. PS : As far as my profile is concerned it's B tech + MBA from tier 1 college and 3 years of tech experience followed by 7 yrs into Product Management and living alone in Bangalore.

I’ve lately been struggling with keeping my energy levels up through the day. My lifestyle isn’t that bad. Decent sleep, frequent exercise, I’m happy etc But I find myself zoning out of conversations and this is affecting my ability to be “liked” at the workplace. It’s not even about being liked, but as a person I don’t like not being able to 100% be there for people when they’re talking to me. It’s what makes us human, in a way. People who are high energy, have you figured what your secret might be? thanks 🙏🏻