I feel so broke this Rakshabandhan!!

So, yesterday was supposed to be all about sibling bonds, but it turned into a reminder of how complicated family can be. You know how some holidays just don't live up to expectations? Yeah, this was one of those. I've got this tradition of reaching out to my guy cousins for Rakshabandhan since I don't have brothers. Usually, it's a nice little exchange - nothing fancy, just a quick "Hey, thinking of you" kind of thing. But this year? Radio silence from one of them. Let's call him Dev. At first, I brushed it off. People get busy, right? But then I saw him commenting on stuff in our family group chat. Ouch. Talk about being left on read. The weird part is, Dev and I generally get along fine. He even made this sweet post about his sister today. It just hit different, you know? Like, oh right, I'm not actually part of that sibling circle. Mom dropped some truth bombs later, mentioning how this isn't exactly new. Apparently, back in the day when we'd send actual rakhis, they'd never even say thanks. I'd totally forgotten about all the heartfelt letters I used to write too. Guess they're still collecting dust somewhere. I'm trying not to let it get to me, but it's hard not to feel a little... I don't know, forgotten? Unimportant? It's just a text, but sometimes it's the little things that speak volumes.

I started my career as a humble analyst in a tech company, worked my way into finance and venture capital and eventually am heading to a top tier bschool in USA, where I will be paying what it costs to go to an ISB/IIM yearly. We have the Warikoos, and countless others breaking down personal finance and urging people to save. I have mostly done the opposite - i.e., spend liberally but not be profligate. Here’s my view. We are a poor country. If you find yourself in a place with the resources to spend more than the average person you’ve grown up around, please do! Spend on what makes you happy, pushes you, drives you, and allows you to step change your life. Security can be achieved with a good insurance plan and decent emergency funds. Beyond that, please spend on experiences that make you a better person, give you access to better people and enrich your life. Eventually time is the most finite commodity we’ll have. We have 1000s of podcasts on savings, mutual funds, ETFs etc. Does anyone talk about spending effectively to enrich your experience? No. I am pointing to a larger theme of a scarcity mindset that indians have, because we have grown up in a low-middle income country. It’s where we come from, but that doesn’t mean we cannot experience abundance. Life is short, don’t listen to people making money off you watching their personal finance videos.

TLDR; I want help in financial planning for my marriage. I have 3 questions which are written at the end of this post. Hi everyone, I sat with my parents to prepare most basic itinerary for 4 functions of marriage, which also includes upgrading the kitchen, bedroom etc. The total amount for that is 21 lacks. Along with this the bride will also be fully taking care of 3 functions. (2 only for themselves, 1 where people from both sides will come) Since we are not in conversation with any potential family, so I CAN ASSUME that they will do it one their own. When we sister got married we gave dowry but we don't wanna have any gifts in any form. (strictly) So, I am in my mid 20s and earning monthly in the range of 90K. Current Expenses: 1. Car loan of around which has EMI of 23K and it has 30 EMIs pending. 2. 40K contribution to household 3. No rental charges since it is wfh Rest of the 25K I save/invest. Current savings - around 2 lacks which are liquid. My questions - 1. If I plan to marry in next 2 years. Then what should be my approach? I am looking to change company for better salary. Anything apart from this I should do? 2. There is no quick money technique nor I want to fall for that. So, what would "you" have done if you would have been at my place? 3. We do have a bungalow which has evaluation of 60 lacks. I don't want us to sell it. I may have to build few rooms on the first floor to start with rental income. What do you suggest wrt this?

Recently received a 50l gift from a relative - direct transfer to bank account. Any suggestions on how to minimise deductions on this and also on how to utilise the remaining sum?

After the Ambani wedding fiesta I was wondering how much do people generally spend on their weddings? For context I am 28 M and unmarried so I can't share my expenditures.

How to survive being 25 year old when you don't have good brothers and sisters.

27M Hey guys, need your guidance on how to handle this 2016- My brother started a powder coating business which become flop by 2020 because of poor planning and spending the loan cash for his personal expenses which made us fall into a debt of INR 35 lakhs. So we sold a land near our home and cleared all the debts had some decent amount left along with it I took a home loan to renovate my home and we completed marriage for my brother also. Everything completed, My brother started to work in a Automation company and he earns INR 20k/m which is a decent salary in cbe 2024- He is again into debt of INR 5L (Online app loans, home credit, loan from friend, cc) because of his poor management,,Currently his salary is 25k. Thinking of his wife and kid, I sold some shares which was worth 1L and closed all the online loans, Even though that is done he still pays 14k EMI, balance which is not sufficient to run the family. Now he’s asking me to help close other loans. I’m already paying home loan and if I take his debt to that will be huge burden for me. I have some saving of 4L which I saved it for my marriage because no land left to sell and spend for my marriage. Should I need to give him so he can close all the debts or how should I deal this? Thanks for reading, I appreciate if you can guide me how to deal this

I am 28 M. I was born in a poor family and to make matters worse my father was diagnosed with a terminal illness when I was still in college. As if watching my father dying was not enough I came to know that my mother was having an affair with my father's friend. I never caught them but I saw their whatsapp messages. My father eventually succumbed to his illness leaving the family responsibilities on my shoulders. I never got to enjoy college. My first paycheck was spent on the medical bills and subsequent paychecks were spent on clearing my brother's education loan, paying back relatives (we borrowed some money for my father's treatment) and just taking care of my family. I want to get married but honestly I don't have any money for it now and I don't want to take a loan. I never had any relationship. It could never become a priority. And it's not about just sex. It's something deeper. Maybe intimacy, maybe human touch, maybe something else. I don't know. I tried hard to focus on my work and hobbies but It merely proved to be a temporary escape. I don't even know why I am narrating all this to a bunch of strangers but then again aren't we all in the same boat at the end?

I wish there was some system which could add logic behind financially helping a relative. Like a bank won’t loan u if ur credit score is bad… And this system should be so integrated that the borrower doesn’t feel bad about it. Bcoz I really feel bad that if some relative has made certain decisions in his life due to which they have to face the consequences… They should only expect help from others where they have had good borrower/lender relationship. I don’t mean we use this system in case of medical emergency… But I feel bad that someone else’s life has to degrade just bcoz of emotions and bondage. So I wish relatives would build good credit history among others in good times. By which it’ll be justified to seek help in bad times. How do you guys handle braking in financially helping out a relative without burning bridge? Bcoz again, in ur bad time this relative can support u. But u never know if a good time is gonna come back for that relative. Just sharing my unstructured thought. And I am sure this problem is common.

What did you do with your first salary?