Thoughts on marrying early, at say 25
This question is for folks who have married early or have friends who have gotten married in their early 20s. What are your thoughts on this front?
One of my friend married at 23, he is doing pretty good for himself right now, if you are a workaholic then it might get difficult to explain things to your partner, you will miss out on some opportunities like hanging out with friends, move cities too frequently, changing jobs and all. But you will gain a rock to anchor yourself to, a friend to share everything with and create new experiences which you might not get marrying late. This is a very big decision take your time to get your priorities aligned and weigh the outcomes.
Also i dont think there is a “right age” to marry someone unless both of you are emotionally and financially at the right place, only happiness matters
I have found the right person, dated for 4 years, but everyone around me is still single. It makes me wonder if we are thinking about rushing things.
Also that leap from being all carefree to being all mature scares me a bit.
I married when I was 29 and it's been 11 years now. From my experience, i would say, it's definitely worth it to get married earlier. Of course life changes dramatically and you no more live for yourself. You cannot say, in the spur of the moment, take a few days off and go on a hike. Your partner's preferences and likes and convenience will also play a major role. However as a couple you get a chance to grow together. When marrying in the late 20's, we also mature by then, so it isn't as fun. I would also say it is much better to have kids early as well.. They need 18-20 years to get through school and college and in the current situation it's definitely important that you're still gainfully employed through this period. The later you marry, your career may wind up before that period and towards the fag end it can take a toll on you physically and financially.
Are you guys still marrying in this century?
For heteros : If you are a guy, sure why not? If you are a female, sure- if you dont wanna have a career, not so sure- if you intend on having a career For queer ppl: you cant, no option.
Anyhow, all said and done, depends on whether you have found the right person for you. If you have, go for it, if you havent, then chill. Getting married early or late to adhere to some fuckedup timeline is only going to fuckup your life, have seen it happen, don’t do it.
Why are you considering career as a factor for a woman?
Women do end up shouldering a greater burden of household and familial responsibilities and this affects their career. I have seen it happen for a lot of my friends and their wives - marriage is the juncture when career trajectories and earnings start diverging between the male and female partners, and in most cases, unfortunately in favour of their male partners. For women it only makes sense if they want to start building a family soon, and are okay with slowing career trajectory. A lot depends on context and partners ofcourse, but that is the overall trend.
I married at 26 with my girlfriend, whom I was dating for 7 years then. We’ve grown together and moulded each other really well.