Thoughts on marrying early, at say 25
This question is for folks who have married early or have friends who have gotten married in their early 20s. What are your thoughts on this front?
One of my friend married at 23, he is doing pretty good for himself right now, if you are a workaholic then it might get difficult to explain things to your partner, you will miss out on some opportunities like hanging out with friends, move cities too frequently, changing jobs and all. But you will gain a rock to anchor yourself to, a friend to share everything with and create new experiences which you might not get marrying late. This is a very big decision take your time to get your priorities aligned and weigh the outcomes.
Also i dont think there is a “right age” to marry someone unless both of you are emotionally and financially at the right place, only happiness matters
I have found the right person, dated for 4 years, but everyone around me is still single. It makes me wonder if we are thinking about rushing things.
Also that leap from being all carefree to being all mature scares me a bit.
I married when I was 29 and it's been 11 years now. From my experience, i would say, it's definitely worth it to get married earlier. Of course life changes dramatically and you no more live for yourself. You cannot say, in the spur of the moment, take a few days off and go on a hike. Your partner's preferences and likes and convenience will also play a major role. However as a couple you get a chance to grow together. When marrying in the late 20's, we also mature by then, so it isn't as fun. I would also say it is much better to have kids early as well.. They need 18-20 years to get through school and college and in the current situation it's definitely important that you're still gainfully employed through this period. The later you marry, your career may wind up before that period and towards the fag end it can take a toll on you physically and financially.
Makes sense
Perfectly said by @BlackMonkey..
My 2c -Marry as early as possible. Would say before 25. Marriage after 30 is a waste of time. It is like entering the hotel at the closing hours. Neither will the service be good nor the food.
Are you guys still marrying in this century?
For heteros : If you are a guy, sure why not? If you are a female, sure- if you dont wanna have a career, not so sure- if you intend on having a career For queer ppl: you cant, no option.
Anyhow, all said and done, depends on whether you have found the right person for you. If you have, go for it, if you havent, then chill. Getting married early or late to adhere to some fuckedup timeline is only going to fuckup your life, have seen it happen, don’t do it.
Why are you considering career as a factor for a woman?
Women do end up shouldering a greater burden of household and familial responsibilities and this affects their career. I have seen it happen for a lot of my friends and their wives - marriage is the juncture when career trajectories and earnings start diverging between the male and female partners, and in most cases, unfortunately in favour of their male partners. For women it only makes sense if they want to start building a family soon, and are okay with slowing career trajectory. A lot depends on context and partners ofcourse, but that is the overall trend.
I married at 26 with my girlfriend, whom I was dating for 7 years then. We’ve grown together and moulded each other really well.
I got married at 27, was engaged at 26. Pretty happy, with a wife to die for, one toddler and one on the way. Could have easily been a disaster if the girl was not right. So age is not a factor, just make sure the partner is right.
If you are satisfied, then there is nothing better than marrying early.
If money was not an issue, I would have been married at 22.
Travel the world together, have babies, socialise better, spend time with family, aaahh such sweet gifts of life.
The only downside I see is that you won’t be able to sleep with a lot of women/men. Trust me, for many people it is a big thing.
But like I said, if you are satisfied, go for it!
And please do not indulge in infidelity.
Thanks for your insightful comment :)
Had a couple of such friends. We eventually ended up seeing less of each other after their marriage. It just happened, wasn't deliberate.
Friends who married late, we are still in touch.
Depends on a lot of factors. I got married at 32 and I’m glad I waited. Was an angsty mess in my 20s. I got to travel, study, work super hard at my job and create a good financial foundation. I had to work very hard on myself to be able to accept a healthy relationship. Overall I’ve seen both sides - people who have married their childhood sweethearts and have grown together and friends who have married at 22 and divorced at 27 as they had grown out of the relationship / wanted different things out of life.
How compatible you are with your spouse makes all the difference.
If I look back now if I has an opportunity to marry my husband at 25 I would have married early so that we would have got more time together when we were young