Controversial Arranged Marriage Meet Ups
Despite the "modern era" we live in, many of us still find ourselves on the path to arranged marriage—often feeling like it's the only option we have. Speaking from personal experience, I've had my fair share of bizarre encounters. Hearing similar stories from my male and female friends who are also going through this process has provided some comfort, especially knowing that I'm not alone. Let's use this comment section to share our experiences—whether they were bad, weird, gut-wrenching, blood-boiling, or even heartbreakingly disappointing
This happened to a close friend and a roommate of mine. This has a good ending, I swear. My friend got engaged to this girl found by his parents and his extended family. Literally everyone in his family approved of this girl and he was really happy. He was happy because his family did the work, background check and everything and they were so sure of her (or atleast that's what he thought). His parents spent a lot of money on their engagement and both him and his parents refused getting dowry as well.
1 month before the wedding, some random guy just knocked at my friend's parents house (he was living in different city with us) and claimed he was in love with that girl whom they matched with my friend. And apparently he threatened them as well. When his parents asked her parents about this, they casually brushed it off saying oh yes they both dated but not anymore. We are not letting him see our daughter. Then their precious daughter says She has still been seeing him everyday even after the engagement. And the reason she agreed to this engagement is so it will get stopped and her parents will have no choice to marry her off to that dude (who didn't have the spine to ask her for marriage). His parents immediately cancelled everything.
My roommate whom I've known for years, used to be a really fun guy and he talked a lot. After this incident he just shut off completely. He just never spoke to anyone and it was obvious he was depressed.
Around a year later (while his depression only gotten worse) a girl who went to school with him and lived in his neighbourhood expressed interest through her parents. She got to know this story and wanted to talk to him. Since they both were single they decided to get married (still arranged). It's been 3 years since his marriage and he seems to be living happily now. His old self seems to be resurfacing.
Your friend must have done some good deeds in the past life. His current wife is nothing less than an angel. Thanks for sharing!!
BiryaniEnthu
Stealth
20 days ago
People hung on exes is a crazy problem and needs to be addressed. Multiple lived getting ruined.
The good ending disclaimer was worth it! I would have read it anyway but was hopeful that something good came out of all the mess 😄
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Spoke to a pilot guy for marriage. My parents had liked the guy way too much cause everything was ok and my dad and sis are in aviation (sissy is pursuing pilot). The guy spoke well. And we were about to meet. I live in Hyd so he was coming to meet. I had spoken to him twice on call. Third time when i was speaking on call, we were just planning when and where to meet. A girl screamed on phone saying “he is my bf”
Mind was blank for a minute and i cut the call. I told this to my family. My family spoke to his family and ties were cut.
Then that guy called me and apologised and said that his ex is not leaving him (how tf its my issue and it was night 10 or 11 when we spoke.) and he complained that my family spoke to his family and told all this mess. I also cried when i spoke to my family. This lame guy thought i cried for him 🤦🏻♀️ i clarified i cried cause of the thought that i was getting into such a big mess.
Till today i hold his stupid ex (stupid cause her guy is looking for marriage outside and she is still with him. No self respect) in high regards cause i believe she is some devi who saved me from a stupid guy.
BiryaniEnthu
Stealth
20 days ago
She is not ex if he is still talking to her. Devi indeed 🙏
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After reading all the horrible stories here, i see merit in people’s demand (men/women) of wanting a partner with no past
@AjaxNinja this is like asking something impossible in todays times. I hv no probs if a guy has past. But def that past should be past n not be mixed with present n future.
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True. A lot of people even in this generation believe that even having friends of the opposite gender is a matter of the past, reflecting their own insecurities.
Yes, everyone has a past and Yes it needs to be discussed with your partner but the question is, how much of it really matters? I mean what good what does that conversation do?
Someone in my circle, met an amazing person through an arranged meet up. Everything was going well. Their thoughts, lifestyle, age etc was all compatibility. The girl one day hesitating told him that she had dated 5 guys and was intimate with 2 of them. But all of that was over and it's been a year. She's not in contact with any of them and she just wanted him to know. He immediately broke off the engagement and told her parents the reason. The girl got an earful from her family.
Honestly, I feel bad for the girl. She seemed like a genuine person and both of them were quite compatible. He was so focused on the past,, he let go of someone who he could have had a great life with. She was honest and probably took out so much courage to open up to him.
And what are the chances that the person hasn't lied about her past just to get married!
Some things just don't make sense
Such things really are quite sensitive in arranged marriages and unfortunately we have to watch every word we speak
Met this guy from FA via JS in the mall. He got too comfortable too soon, just kept talking about himself the whole time. On the way back, he insisted he drop me and kept his hand on my knee. I removed it and told him I was uncomfortable yet he tried to push it higher and higher stating ‘if I won’t do it then who will’. I held his hand firmly to ensure it doesn’t go further up. The whole times he’s talking about how physical compatibility is extremely important to him and he’d like to test it ASAP.
Got dropped, called him up and told him I’d never like to see him again quite respectfully. The guy turned the whole thing around on me and gave me an earful.
JACKASS!
Another guy - one day into the conversation brings up the topic of kinks and proceeds to tell me all about them and the ones he’d like to try. The only other topic he enjoys talking about is his flatmates failing love life. As a rule of thumb, I drop people who spend a lot of time talking about other people because they have no real hobbies of their own.
The FA guy is a complete asshole. I don't even understand how some men just act like they own us and can do whatever the fuck they want.
And that rule of thumb definitely makes a lottt of sense. People who talk about others, live their entire lives being a shadow but at the same time acting like they are holier than thou
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AdeptFowl5
Stealth
21 days ago
Sorry to hear you had to go through this.
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BiryaniEnthu
Stealth
20 days ago
The stories are f*ing scary!
Don't know how people even get married 😶
LooseGoose
Stealth
20 days ago
Never went for it, will never go for it. Pointless to talk to a partner who comes with a laundry list of checkboxes and expectations.
Plus, those who couldn't secure a partner themselves over so many years are kind of a red flag.
Bittergourd
Stealth
20 days ago
@LooseGoose exactly 💯
I agree and I feel this in the same way like you.
Be it an arranged marriage or love marriage, every relationship comes with expectations. It's a human tendency after all. Since the process of an arranged marriage is more mechanical in nature and both parties know that they are looking for a life partner, they discuss their preferences for marriage in the first few meetings itself. Whereas it's not the same for love marriages which happen organically after you've been in a relationship with a person for a very long time and then the topic of marriage comes up. I've seen people in healthy relationships over 10 years not getting married and finally ending up in a happy arranged marriage. I've also seen people getting married after being in a relationship for a few months.
Securing a life partner is not a prize you win at an arcade. It's all a matter of fate. I don't understand how you that call it a red flag.
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Someone had just described arranged marriage as clearance sale of dil tute aashiqs, 🤷
Idk if you mean this as a joke but heartbreaks aren't easy especially when it's in your 20s and your parents have no idea about anything and put a lot of pressure on you to get married. So after the heartbreak and emotional exhaustion people give in and get an arranged marriage.
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There was a study which was done (I will find a link to it) which concluded THE PEOPLE WHO THINK THEY ARE LUCKY, THOSE ATTRACT GOOD EVENTS AND SUCCESS.
AND NEGATIVE PEOPLE ATTRACT THE OPPOSITE.
Hence, don't worry about comments above. Focus on your life and be positive 😊 You surely will get a good man/lady
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