27F Engineer: Software Engineering Not Worth It For Women?

Dont have kids - if possible dont marry either..earn and have fun would be my advice

Hmm, someone I know has more than 10+ patents(ex-broadcom), is a tech evangelist and an implementation advisor for a cloud tech, have 3 kids with fourth on the way. Sometimes you just need a supportive environment.

That will stand true for any corporate career, nothing to do with Software Engineer I think. You need to climb up the career ladder, it will always be a struggle and huge sacrifice on personal family front. How is Software Engineer career any different. And talking of this career line, there are a few companies which give great benefits to women, they may not pay great, but they have great work culture, flexibility of work schedule, you can leave office early and connect from home for some time etc.

Industry is same for all. Let's not involve man-women thing here. Everyone is struggling these days, time is challenging for everyone working in IT.

There are so many men out there who don't have a job or earn 5x less than a financially successful woman. How many financially successful women have you seen marry, have kids with a 5x less financially successful man. The odds of that are pretty low. There would be exceptions but that's not the norm. While it is encouraged that women challenge gender norms by being successful at work, it is not encouraged that men challenge gender norms by being unsuccessful at work. What's wrong with that? A successful woman wants to pair up with an equally busy successful man, but that increases odds of failure. Why not challenge gender norms and let a successful woman pair up with an unsuccessful man? Well, blame patriarchy for that, but that's not going to really challenge gender norms. Males are expected to live by rules of 19th century while females play by rules of 21st century.

Wdym ? Can you maybe add in more of your thoughts on what led you to this conclusion or question ?

It’s mostly same for both men and women. As you grow up the ladder, you have to sacrifice some thing - friends, family, health, relationships.
Kuch na kuch to chutega hi bunny. So jo hai jahaan hai.. enjoy.

It could be because people tend to realize late that there are opportunity costs of everything and have the mindset early on that they can have it all but it's not practical.

Being a woman, I can understand what OP is trying to convey.

This kind of sacrifice is done by men usually in all corporate jobs and has been for a long time. Just that they don’t talk about it. After an age, most people working are not doing it for fun. But for responsibilities, especially post marriage, where every decision needs to be thought through in that context. Hence the quest for that next promotion, hence those long hours in office, having to spend extra hours showing you can manage upwards and reportees. These men spent time away from their kids/family and were somehow castigated for the same. Still they had the support system or divorces in cases the husband was deemed unavailable. You are going through the same grind and would need same kind of support. Might be easier in tech compared to other industries.