How to not be needing someone

I never had a gf in my life. Loved lot of girls, asked 2 but was rejected. Still looking for someone, although nothing solid yet. But now I have grown paranoid of relationships. Now I don't believe if someone will love me back. If I do find someone who shows interest, I feel like they will leave me eventually so I don't go ahead. I am stuck in a catch 22 situation, I cannot trust someone but I also need someone. I have tried telling myself that I don't need anyone, I should focus on my goals and dreams. And I do focus, but then it comes back to me. I get lovesick and I can't go on. I exercise daily, work on daily tasks, practise for interview as I am planning to switch, play badminton with friends. And still when the day ends, I feel need to hold hands with someone. Don't misunderstand this for loneliness, I love being alone and I prefer to be that most of the time. When I want to have some company, i go eat, play with friends. I have tried finding different cures for this feeling, like exercise, games, friends but nothing has worked out yet. It's not even sadness, it's just empty void. How do you get rid of this emotion?