WobblyBurrito
WobblyBurrito

How to manage parent's pressure about marriage

Need help. How do you not let yourself be affected by your parents' worry about marriage? My parents can't find a suitable match in our caste. They aren't internet savvy, and English isn't their language, so they pester me daily about not looking for matches. Filtering by caste and my city on Shaadi.com or JS gives only 80-100 profiles, most with requirements I don't meet. This affects me, and I end up shouting at my parents. It's not my fault they can't find someone, or that I seek a progressive family and partner. You can't choose your parents, but you can choose your partner. Why should I settle where I don't feel like myself? I'm losing it.

5mo ago
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FuzzyNarwhal
FuzzyNarwhal
HSBC5mo

Have been in a situation like this, and here's my advice..

  • Speak to your parents about reducing some of the restrictions.. While it's preferable to marry within your community, it's not always easy to find someone who is like minded and even if you do, in some cases it doesn't turn out the way you want

  • Most of these matrimonial websites are being managed by the prospects parents, and they have a totally different view of what they wants vs. what the guy/girl in question wants. Also, I've come across fake profiles as well as guys who only want to hook on these websites as well. So be careful even when you're meeting someone from such websites

  • Put a time line perhaps, like maybe 2/3 years, etc. So that you and parents are also working towards a realistic goal. Find time and take efforts, so that your parents can see that you are genuinely making an effort

  • I'm not married, and I haven't had a great experience from these matrimonial websites, so I would recommend try other options. Like single mixer events, apps, etc.. Perhaps you might meet like-minded people

  • I'm sure your parents only want what's best for you, so be kind to them. You'll surely find a way to connect with them and make them understand.

Lastly, all the best for your search 💜

ZippyBoba
ZippyBoba

Bro take a deep breath. If you know what you want and can wait a little then tell them the same, they'll probably understand.

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