How does one develop "certainty" without limiting one's perspective?

I'm typing this out as a way of collecting my thoughts and feeling a bit normal to take myself through the day. Context: I have been working with a small b2b IT firm for the last 1.5 years, and resigned yesterday. This was my first job straight out of MBA and it has sucked the soul out of me to say the least. The notice period is 3 months and I am really unsure how will I survive it considering that I'm already completely drained. I do not want to list out the reasons of how this place has been toxic for me because I also carry a lot of self doubt if it was really the toxicity of the place or my own incapability to handle the work. I do not have any offer in hand, and haven't started a job search either. Just wanted to put this out there to see if people here in the community have been in a similar situation in their professional lives and how did they figure out the uncertainty, was it a good decision for them in retrospect and if they have any tips for me to deal with this better, with less anxiety.

Want to get some perspective here because I think it’d be valuable to hear about other people’s experiences. This job at Google has completely destroyed my confidence and I feel so paranoid about shipping anything now. I have made some mistakes but I have always caught them in staging or working drafts. Here is what my manager has said to me: - I lack attention to detail. - I do not have drive. - I do not have any ambition. And the reason I have been told this is because: I messed up a flow that the Lead PM had come up with in the first place. Then the Lead PM flips back on me and says that it would be "an embarrassment" to ship this. I find myself immersed in a constant cycle of spending hours each day reviewing work, gripped by the fear of facing criticism or even the prospect of being fired. Despite investing significant time and effort, it seems that the only feedback I receive is overwhelmingly negative. It has reached a point where I question myself and wonder if I should have not been here at all. This toxic work environment is undeniably draining, and I'm left grappling with insane anxiety. Has anyone else faced this?

I've always been someone who's had to think well before I spoke. Unless it's something I'm very well aware of (ex: my day to day work), I take time, first to make up the words in my head and then deliver. This delay, is something I want to work on. If you've been in my place at some point, what made you change; and improve on your communication? I don't think this is hindering my abilities at work, but it certainly does - in connecting with new people and in all the non-work comms.

Started working in a new org two months back as a PM. while discussing new requirememts with the tech I am always affraid that whatever I am saying is correct or not. As I am not familiar with all the systems. Sometimes during sprint planning tech will tell me or my manager would say you missed this scenario or this functionality works like this so we may have some issue in approach you are taking. I feel like everyone is judging me if I am making any mistake. No idea how to overcome this , pretty low on confidence now a days and keep on thinking am I good enough ?

What’s the most important career advice you’ve ever received? It could be anything, an advice from your colleague, a lesson you learnt the hard way, or a piece of wisdom that changed your perspective! 🌟🌟

I've had the fortune of having worked in 3 countries so far. India is by far the most exciting place to be in 2024. But there's something about our work ethic that just concerns me. In both white and blue collar. In most other countries, I've observed people strictly sticking to the 9 to 5, working diligently in those hours - not wasting too much time on chai sutta breaks, instagram browsing, gupshup etc. They work for 8 hours, then leave. And think about work directly the next day. In India, most of us spend more hours - but very obviously very few of those hours are productive. In fact, I lately feel that too many people around me are doing even 2-3 hours of work on a good day. We end up just staying around, passing time, and then go back home. When we could have achieved so much more. Work ethic has fallen. Work hours have gone up. We need to be more mindful of our actions, we need to work well at work, and then do well at home. I think it's a function of being over populated. There are 1.5-2 people doing what 1 person should be doing, hence this effect. Needs to be fixed, it's the sign of a major problem in the workforce. Thoughts?

Since early childhood all I talked, watched and read was Technology. When I got home from school, I worked on C++ and built games by modelling physics, collisions etc. I frequented a ton of online forums for WebGL and other archaic tech that most of you don't even know about. I knew all about the Silicon Valley, the stories and legends. I learned all about the history of technology and used to work deeply with my father with transistors, ECU/ECMs etc during weekends. I thought I knew it all. I thought I was the deal. I remember schooling folks about all of this, making them realise they are dumb as hell. I remember when I stepped into my MS in CS program and attended a club meeting, I realized that I was just like everybody else. They were all the same as me in hindsight. They knew the same things and lived and breathed the same passion. I knew I wasn't special. For the first time, I suffered ego-death. I thought I was special, and I was not. This is just a reminder, that you are not special. You are less unique than you think you are. So lose that attitude.

Started meditating now and use my Apple Watch for guidance. I wonder what other people are doing. Because I’m having some rough nights sleeping in due to anxiety. Avoiding anxiolytics or beta blockers for now. Also avoiding a mental health therapist for as long as I can.