Software Engineer

Many young Iranians, like 27yearold Neda, are choosing to remain single, valuing their freedom over marriage.  The average age of marriage is rising, with women marrying at 27 and men at 30 in Teh...

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- Many young Iranians, like 27-year-old Neda, are choosing to remain single, valuing their freedom over marriage.
- The average age of marriage is rising, with women marrying at 27 and men at 30 in Tehran.
- Government incentives like low-interest loans and financial support for infertile couples have not reversed the trend.
- Social media and economic hardships are significant factors deterring marriage among the youth.
- Some couples are opting for cohabitation, known as white marriage, despite it being forbidden by religion and law. 

 Source: [Financial Times](https://www.ft.com/content/bce57b6e-af04-4e70-82b3-153351299028)

Iran's Leaders Urge Action as Youth Shun Marriage

Journalist

Iran's Leaders Urge Action as Youth Shun Marriage- Grapevine

Dating has become the norm for relationships today, but many don't realize that it's a relatively recent development, prevalent in Western society for only about a century, and it's already causing societal issues.

Previously, Indian arranged marriages were standard (different from forced marriages). Families would arrange meetings between their daughters and another family's sons. If they liked each other, they would soon plan the wedding, marry, have sex, and start families.

Today, individuals are left to find their own partners. If you don't find someone in high school, university, or work, your chances of finding a partner diminish. There's also less incentive for marriage, as sex no longer requires marriage or even dating, leading to more people pursuing sex directly. This has created a skewed dynamic where fewer men pursue women due to competition, turning to porn instead, while women face exploitation by men who have abundant choices.

Ultimately, near 28-30 both genders rush to the arranged marriage system to get them a partner while having their feet dipped on dating apps.

In the US,
This has lead to decreased marriage rates and, consequently, lower birth rates since most births occur within marriages. A decline in families results in a decreased population, putting more pressure on younger generations to support an aging population. Western nations, therefore, rely heavily on immigration, causing additional challenges. Increased single motherhood also correlates with higher crime rates, drug use, loneliness, mental health issues, and suicides

P.S. I'm young and dating too. Just thoughts for a conversation on what the implications of dating for us as a society could be.

Dating has failed Americans, now it will fail Indians too

Your description of arranged marriages is incorrect. You are given the option that if they liked each other get got married - which was not the case in the last generation. Often times the meetings was just formality, and my own mother met father on the day of their engagement. So nope, they didn’t have the choice to see if they liked each other, their parents made that decision for them. 
  
 Now take that into today’s scenario, how many people in this generation will willingly marry someone their parents has chosen, without any say in it? None. Doesn’t matter what their income is. You yourself are dating.. why? You can ask your parents to find someone for you, if you believe their judgment. The issue is that we don’t, and people avoid admitting that cos they don’t wanna be seen as someone who disagrees with their parents. 
  
 People are free to do what they like, arrange, love, dating, single, unmarried, adoption with marriage. Literally their choice. Nothing is ruining anything, in fact the recent situation in our country, where there are no laws upheld for rich, unemployed where 40% IITians aren’t placed, religious division - are more of a concern than a person’s personal choice. My 2 cents 🙌🏻

Senior Designer

Product Manager

Welcome to Office Gossip's Private Community

Why so many affairs in office these days ?

My boss has affair with work life balance. He doesnt share it with anyone

Engineering Manager

Fuck , what a waste of weekend.

story -

I am 27 years old and i am not rich enough like grapevine people. I earn 9 LPA and doing remote job. So parents started looking for girl for arrange marriage. So there is program arranged in our caste where boy and girl has to register beforehand. Registration fees is 500 per person and 400 for booklet. So i paid around 1900 and lunch is also included. This program invites all the prospects under one roof and booklet was given. Booklet has all the details of prospects.So registered candidates can have multiple meetings with different people. As you already guessed it this is problem of supply demand. Female candidates are way less and male candidates are way more. We have so many experiences like girl family just outright reject you on the basis where i live. That girl was doing nothing and have done  bcom. Also one girl family rejected us soon as we just sit for a meeting. Reason dad of female earns 4X than my father income. We had some meetings around 5-15 but hardly any positive response. Female family is able to do 20-25 meetings at  minimum and they can have choice whom to reject just on weight factor too. Shitshow out their for arrange marriage. We had a quarrel at home after coming from program that i wore some multicolour tshirt thats why we dont have further meeting. Also my parents are giving me lecture that i should have wore gold chain and bracelet to impress other people. 

another thing in booklet , boys has to mention salary. There is no mandatory thing to mention salary of girl in same booklet. Also girls are given return gift for just attending the function.

fair warning - rant on whole ecosystem of arrange marriage

Software Developer

The post seems to be from a Doctor and the first half sounds more like you're wasting your life if you're not having sex or kids. Like there's no purpose in life if you aren't getting this.

(And that's how India made 130+ crore earthlings!)

33M here and these points sounded fascinating when I was 25-26, but not anymore. Except for the EMI part everything else looks like a blessing instead of being in a bad marriage. If you're in your late 30s and unmarried, how has it been for you?

What does future and "purpose" mean to you at this point of life?

Any 35+ M here and who is going through this?

Program Manager

Finding Romance is gone 😂

Growth Manager

Will this happen in India too? Are you folks still planning to have kids?

This is a very interesting topic. I wonder what the impact will be on so many things. 
- People get married later, have kids much much later 
- Effectively you're getting fewer of your "fitter" years with your kid (although lifetime is elongated too) 
- We've added at least 5 years of working as a single guy/gal to our lifetimes. 

Question to the broader community: I don't see most people between 25 to 30 being super happy. Most people actually seem misguided (me/my friends - in some ways). Is this pattern actually harmful for us?

Analyst

Help your brothers

I'm in late 20's now. 
  
 To my bro's in their early 20's: 
  
 "Please priorities your fitness. Aim to establish a routine and get into a shape you yourself are comfortable with and proud of."

Growth And Strategy

Security Analyst

At what age you guys are thinking for marriage, I'm 27, relative says I passed the age😂

If you wanna go for arrange marriage, get married now, or atleast start looking. It's disgusting but the arranged marriage scene works like a market, and the value tends to drop the closer you're to 30. Options decrease as age goes up. 
  
 If you wanna go for love marriage, find someone you love and chill.

Data engineer

The vision of working from scratch to build wealth has made so many families be in middle class
Dowry also pushed families from wealthy to working class
Raising kids as frustrated, tired individuals - Such a shitty arrangement imo

[Controversial] Parents' gen arrange marriages - Mom's father had money, our father had degrees

Consultant

To all those guys who have decided to stay unmarried for their  whole life.... What's the reason ?????

Men only........

For folks here who crib everytime I tell them to work/return to India - check this blind theead and see how difficult it can get to find matches for avg person - 


Check out this post! "Move back to india (Mental Health)"
https://us.teamblind.com/s/0cFekAgj

Return to india

I am a 29 YO single male. I earn decently well for my age. Lately I haven’t been feeling well. As in, life is just passing by and nothing brings me joy anymore - No PS5, No long drives, no movies or shows. 
Weekends are especially lonely. During weekdays, I make sure I go to my office everyday even though it’s hybrid, to avoid feeling lonely. 
I don’t have any female friends to talk about things deeply as most of those friends are now getting married. (you know how is it with us boys. It feels weird to share emotions or talk about life with the same sex somehow). Same for male friends. They are all getting married. 
Somehow, it just feels like I focused too much on my work and didn’t invest time in finding a mate at the right time. 
Now, on weekends, I just lay on my bed like a loser. I was never like this. I had so much drive to work, to explore, etc. But now it all seems pointless. 

Do you guys have any suggestions on what to do?

Loneliness - Nothing brings joy anymore

Get checked for Vitamin D & B12 levels also ADHD

Product Owner

Crazy story of a friend's friend
School best friends had jokingly committed to the idea - if we don't find someone, we'll marry each other

Both dated around, got hearts broken (broke some hearts)
10 years later, they are together and marrying in second half of the year.

Funny thing, both are 25yo

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