Fuck , what a waste of weekend.
story -
I am 27 years old and i am not rich enough like grapevine people. I earn 9 LPA and doing remote job. So parents started looking for girl for arrange marriage. So there is program arranged in our caste where boy and girl has to register beforehand. Registration fees is 500 per person and 400 for booklet. So i paid around 1900 and lunch is also included. This program invites all the prospects under one roof and booklet was given. Booklet has all the details of prospects.So registered candidates can have multiple meetings with different people. As you already guessed it this is problem of supply demand. Female candidates are way less and male candidates are way more. We have so many experiences like girl family just outright reject you on the basis where i live. That girl was doing nothing and have done bcom. Also one girl family rejected us soon as we just sit for a meeting. Reason dad of female earns 4X than my father income. We had some meetings around 5-15 but hardly any positive response. Female family is able to do 20-25 meetings at minimum and they can have choice whom to reject just on weight factor too. Shitshow out their for arrange marriage. We had a quarrel at home after coming from program that i wore some multicolour tshirt thats why we dont have further meeting. Also my parents are giving me lecture that i should have wore gold chain and bracelet to impress other people.
another thing in booklet , boys has to mention salary. There is no mandatory thing to mention salary of girl in same booklet. Also girls are given return gift for just attending the function.
Middle class girls have it much harder. And to be fair there is nothing wrong in father wanting a good life for his daughter than he is able to provide her currently
No ill intentions to all the other folks suggesting you not to marry until your job pays you x LPA.
Leave them. It's fine; 27 is a very good age. My cousin earns 3.6 LPA, working remotely. He got married at 25 to a very good sanskari girl. Not everyone is a gold digger. You will find someone who values you, not the money you earn.
To be honest, 9 LPA remote is a very decent amount for comfortable living. It seems like you live with your parents, so no house rents, etc.
All the best. Stay patient. If someone is marrying you for salary and thinks 9 LPA is not good, then it's your win; she ain't worth it.
Thanks man for motivational words. Will be looking 🙌
To be honest, one of the really good answers i have seen on this thread, i have also witnessed the market has blown this topic out of proportion that growing first then marry, that’s not what everyone wants. Let them be. Do what feels right at any age. Marrying at 32 also has many cons so people balance it their way.
Mating market is similar throughout - whether it is dating or marriage. Stacks are always against men and women have a disproportionate amount of choices.
Be prepared for more such weekends!
Story time -
I know someone who was in very much similar situation as yours. Spent almost 2 yrs looking for girls, the guy checked all boxes ( good family background, family home in big city, tech-sales job). The only hurdle was - he’s making X LPA and girls with even 0.5X LPA wasn’t showing interest.
In the meantime, guy got some good appraisals at work and started making ~ 1.75X LPA.
Result - The family which he met 1ish year ago came back and he’s getting engaged next month. Girl still makes < X LPA
I was so confused/amused as I felt the whole discussion on equality is falling flat in my mind and I can’t find a definitive answer.
Yeah got the proper taste. Next event is on 25th feb 2024. Will be writing the rant again 😭😭. There is no definitive answer but money is solution. So whole system revolves around salary package.
No wrong intentions, but I think marriage at 27, that too at low income is not a good idea. I am also of 27 and I feel this is the age where we explore and develop our career, it's a big world out there needing lots of skills and this is the right time to skill up. Plan up where you want to see yourself in 5 years wrt career and family as well, then decide if it's time to marriage
He has started looking out. No harm in that.
Also, better to have an early experience of the arranged marriage market than the actual wedding. 😉
Actually there is some age - cap in my caste where everyone gets married. So we just started searching before 6 months and we have a break of 2 months due to layoffs. So will be working on myself is the best idea.
Arranged marriage has fucked up recently. It is reasonable for bride's to choose the best and higher earning groom. When given so many choices, it is akin to tinder, just offline.
It is also reasonable for you to get frustrated. You are not at fault here, just on the adverse side of circumstances for now.
Keep looking for girls for atleast next 2-3 years, you don't have to settle till then. Also, keep focusing on your career, late 20s usually face an inflection point in your career and incomes.
Your to-be wife is somewhere who is independently focusing on her career too and by the time you meetup, she will be in a better stage of her life too.
Yeah lets hope for the best 🙌
27 is the apt age to start looking for marriage. Keep looking and you will have to find only one girl who match you. The pool of girls is the highest for your age.
The vision of working from scratch to build wealth has made so many families be in middle class Dowry also pushed families from wealthy to working class Raising kids as frustrated, tired individuals - Such a shitty arrangement imo
I know I'm not the only one having to go through this. Let's speak our heart out.
I've been of the opinion that I don't want to marry and will enjoy life single. Turned 28 this year and for some reasons, my thoughts and perceptions changed and decided to give it a shot. Installed a matrimony app and didn't find much ...
She hasn’t seen the CTC Megathreads in grapevine yet. All these guys will get dumped.
That bald guy is me. 😢
It’s so easy for women to “settle” while men have to bear every responsibility and burden only to get blamed or cheat...
