Connected by Lonely in Bangalore (viral online post)

I saw a friend tweet about how Bangalore is full of connected but lonely people jumping in to join every Meetup/WhatsApp group that becomes available. This is my problem with the meetup / conference culture. Meetup culture is all about optionality. You think you'll meet someone new who's cool. Someone who can help you build your network. You would rather join a meetup with 100 other strangers than build stronger connections with your friends. In life there are only a few people who really matter. People who you can call at 11 PM to rant about your workday. People who you know will be genuinely happy about your promotion. People you share screenshots from work with. It is not probably the 100 strangers in that Whatsapp group that you think of when you are having a health issue and want to share your fears. It also means lowering your ego, which I'm happy to do with my old friends. I'm always happy to ping them when I get the chance, and I'm the one asking them to call me. I'm the one who asks them to hang out with me. I used to think, "Why bother?" but then I realised that it doesn't matter who reaches out first. It is not about keeping a count. I realised it's for me! If I have a chat with a friend of mine who I have known for over 10 years, my mood improves immediately. Everyone is very busy. Everyone is stressed with their jobs and their personal lives. Some of them are married now. Some have children. But that's where you've got to work to keep connecting with the people who matter to you. Friendship is also about being vulnerable. True friendship is built on vulnerability. Being able to share your dreams, your failures and your demons with each other. While the meetup culture is all about bumping into people for 5 minutes to judge their worth and whether they are worth your time, my preference is for long 1-1s. Either on the phone or face to face. I am happy to meet just one person over the weekend and have hours of conversation about work, life or wha