Deteriorating mental health

Thanks for showing courage and accepting that there is a problem

1. Go and see a good doctor, there is no harm in discussing it with professional
   As you are staying alone, no one will ever know

2. Start looking for a shift ,
   Take a job in a medium/ big size firm Jpmc, hsbc, Barclays..these guys always have opportunities for an experienced person ( have seen many product owner openings in volvo but that’s a different domain)

Start going to nearby temple in morning and stay for 15 minutes ( it works)

All the best ..

Dekh dost, you are just a number for the org. Trust me when I tell you, it ties back to a simple metric of revenue per employee (payback metric) - I calculate this for my org and it’s a shitty practice. Not worth ruining your peace of mind over it. I know it’s easier said than done, but get out and do what pleases you. The hardest part is just starting.

Pls hit pubs and start dating

I'm not a PM so I can't say that work wise I understand what pressure you might be under but I do work at a startup, I've felt the pressure of work and having to deal with multiple stakeholders and I am unmarried and deal with loneliness quite often. At one point I was working 10-12 hours a day which led to a point where I was so burnt out that I could hardly function. I finally started therapy then and it's been an absolute game changer. The things I've unearthed about myself and the work I've done in therapy and improved my relationship with work and people around me. I feel much more content with myself and I'm able to draw healthy boundaries. I'm able to say no at work without the fear of sounding like a bad employee. In addition to this I do the following things to keep my mental health in check :

1. Constantly in touch with family. Even a phone call with them is a sweet reminder of the fact that I have people who care and would show up for me at the drop of a hat.

2. Excercise. Hate it, curse it, do it. Endorphins can really change your headspace.

3. Have a good circle of friends. I call them up when I'm sad and lonely tell them how I'm feeling. I let them help me. I stay over at their place for a day or two sometimes.

4. Do things I find peace in - walks, cooking, reading.

5. No work before 9 am and after 7 pm. My manager knows this and I only work outside of this timeline if it's a code red situation.

The hard reality is only you're responsible for your happiness. Between choosing better (boundaries, friends, lifestyle) and getting help (therapy) you'll be okay.

Apart from all the above suggestions, I wanna pour some inputs to handle “PM-stress” -

1. I can totally sense you’re in a business driven org and they keep putting pressure on you. If you’ve a defined priority list, every time a new ask come to you, ask them to deprioritise existing items.
2. Increase the communication frequency, make it a written communication. Startups usually lack the written part.
3. Share your troubles with product leadership, escalate more, it’s not right to suffer alone. The “senior” tag should not make you feel lonely in this journey.
4. Last but not the least, move on, some journeys are not meant for everyone. This journey might not take you anywhere at the end.