I think I'm losing my mind. I'm a 32-year-old guy in tech, graduated from IIIT Delhi, earning 78L annually, but I feel like I'm fooling everyone, including myself. It's as if I'm constantly waiting for someone to burst into the office and shout, "Hey, fraud! We've finally figured out you're actually useless!"
I know it sounds like I'm humble-bragging, but trust me, I'm not. This feeling is eating me alive.
Seven years ago, I started as a regular software engineer. Somehow, I kept getting promoted. Now I'm leading a team of 15 people, handling critical projects, and sitting in meetings with the higher-ups. But every time I'm in those meetings, I feel like a kid wearing his dad's oversized suit, pretending to be an adult.
I work my ass off - late nights, weekends, you name it. But I always feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water. When my team comes to me with problems, I'm secretly panicking, thinking, "Why are you asking me? I'm as clueless as you!"
The worst part? Everyone around me seems to think I'm some kind of wunderkind. My boss is always praising me in front of others. My team looks up to me. Even my parents are bragging about me to all our relatives. But inside, I'm constantly terrified that I'll make one tiny mistake and everyone will realize I'm a fraud.
I see my college batchmates on LinkedIn, and they all seem so confident and successful. Meanwhile, I'm here, earning more than I ever thought I would, but feeling like I don't deserve any of it.
I can't even enjoy my success. I bought a nice house last year, but instead of feeling proud, I keep thinking, "What if they fire me tomorrow? How will I pay for this?" It's like I'm waiting for everything to come crashing down.
I know it's ridiculous to complain about a high-paying job when so many people are struggling. But this constant fear of being "found out" is driving me insane. I can't even talk to my friends about it because they'll probably think I'm just showing off.
Has anyone else felt like this? How do you deal with feeling like a fraud when everyone thinks you're successful? Is this just part of adult life that no one talks about?
This is what eats me alive during weekends, realised it's Friday and panic typed this here
Socrates: “I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing.”
It’s a very common phenomenon these days because of how much we have been able to achieve in such short timelines which has no parallel in our family or friends. It makes us doubt our capabilities. Maybe it’s true, maybe it’s not but what I have learnt as long as you are aware of your shortcomings and willing to learn, you will be okay.
And once in a while remember we are all going to die, soak in the success and enjoy the moment.
1st stanza last line ✨
Nice house, fat paycheck, and still feeling like a fraud? Sounds rough, bro. Maybe try crying into your piles of cash - I hear it's therapeutic.
Dude, you're not alone in this! Impostor syndrome is super common, especially for high achievers. Your success is legit - you've worked hard for it. Remember, feeling out of your depth often means you're growing. Most people feel like they're winging it sometimes, even if they look confident. Keep crushing it, and try to give yourself credit for how far you've come. You've earned your spot!
Not earning as much as you are. But I get you. I have the same feeling half the time. I feel like an imposter who just made it through with luck and no hard/valuable work.
Instead of feeling this anxiety everytime, I've decided to work on upgrading my skillset now. Courses, competitions etc. This helps build my confidence a bit.
I have a bunch of friends who have the same imposter syndrome. We all have different ways to deal with it.
Knowledge builds confidence.
Have you ever think how much company is earning and giving you peanuts. If you are thinking you are earning free money so i am sharing my assumption may be its correct may be its wrong but since our childhood we always surrounded by movies and we starts thinking like - Money can earn through hard work only. No employer is foolish and there are too many things considered like your Academics, your past company, your behavior otherwise a labour(Who build the house) Should earn atleast 1 Cr per annum because he is shakimaan
This guy thinks
Quite a lot!
Similar feeling , I wasted 4 years of my life in a mid size company wit no projects and no real work experience. I boasted my projects and recently landed a job in good company with 100%hike.
Unable to work now , my juniors are much better than me . Fearing they might fire me off once they know my real truth
What about if someone wasted almost the same years but in a big company. Because of the pilot batch?
It's right time to shift.
I am struggling now, but trying hard to learn and understand.
Learning from juniors too without ego.
Maybe after 1-2years I will have my worth
78 L wala esa kya kam krte ho tum log
Meetings, decision making, and fakin.
Bhai mujhe lele
Bro, F U 😂.
What's this nonsense train of thoughts you have right here ? Why all the fear ? I bet if you talk with even the founder of a big company, he'll definitely say "It's normal what you are feeling. The feeling of not knowing anything and somehow you figured out the way and reached here".
I'm younger than you, earning probably 10th of what you earn. But even I'm as clueless as you. Forget me. My prev reporting manager who had 10YoE, also felt the same as you are. Everytime I reached out to him when my lead and seniors were unavailable, he took time to find out what can be done. At one point, he openly said in a 1-on-1 that he sometimes felt clueless when I asked him for help. Literally shivering within. Yet he took time and helped me out.
He said that's how you become a better person at work, in life as well. It's not knowing everything, not being the best person, not having all the skills you need. It's who you are and how you deal with a situation. It's how you figure out the way through the barricade, the wall and maybe even the ocean if you are thrown at it. He also said that he too is a human, not a god, not an AI model to know everything. But what he has is experience. Something that he has developed subconsciously over the years (which you too will definitely have).
Infact, I bet your boss knows this. He knows you know not everything or even nothing, BUT you'll figure out your way when you are given something to solve. So, chill maar. Enjoy life. Save well, Invest well. Keep yourself happy. Keep your loved ones happy. Keep up the good work.
Good one
It generally happens when u have high brains to work anywhere but heart is not in the work , so generally people go through identity crisis and feel empty from inside and this point of time it's hard to choose a Different track of course
How do you know "it generally happens"?
My own experience
I think you need to spend time beyond work. You are too much invested in work that during free times, negative thoughts are capturing it.
See simple thing is - If you have skills, what worst can happen, you might not make 78 but 68. Trust your growth, skills and make use of financial comfort.
👌🏻
I am NITian 24 Male working at 11LPA in IT sector. I am worried a lot about the future. I am very smart and knowledgeable with high IQ and EQ and possess knowledge of about everything and every field. Kinda like "Jack of all trades, mast...
If you are the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.
14 years back , i started my career with 5k monthly salary, two years back my pkg was 57.5 LPA fixed. Currently getting around 80 LPA. Sometimes i feel i made a good progress but sometimes i feel jealous when i see in some leet code disc...
Remember Tazos? The ones we got free with Lays and Cheetos in 1998ish? Which had Cartoon network characters like...
How do you deal with feeling like a fraud at work?
I'm convinced I'm going to be exposed as a complete incompetent any day now. Anyone else feel like they're just really good at faking it?
I’m honestly tired of scrolling through posts where people brag about making 90L+ a year. It feels like a slap in the face for those of us grinding away at regular jobs with regular pay. Are these salaries even real, or are we just being...
They are all true Source - trust tech bros
