Making 78L at 32, but I feel like an imposter. Is this normal? (Self-reflection + seeking advice)
I think I'm losing my mind. I'm a 32-year-old guy in tech, graduated from IIIT Delhi, earning 78L annually, but I feel like I'm fooling everyone, including myself. It's as if I'm constantly waiting for someone to burst into the office and shout, "Hey, fraud! We've finally figured out you're actually useless!"
I know it sounds like I'm humble-bragging, but trust me, I'm not. This feeling is eating me alive.
Seven years ago, I started as a regular software engineer. Somehow, I kept getting promoted. Now I'm leading a team of 15 people, handling critical projects, and sitting in meetings with the higher-ups. But every time I'm in those meetings, I feel like a kid wearing his dad's oversized suit, pretending to be an adult.
I work my ass off - late nights, weekends, you name it. But I always feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water. When my team comes to me with problems, I'm secretly panicking, thinking, "Why are you asking me? I'm as clueless as you!"
The worst part? Everyone around me seems to think I'm some kind of wunderkind. My boss is always praising me in front of others. My team looks up to me. Even my parents are bragging about me to all our relatives. But inside, I'm constantly terrified that I'll make one tiny mistake and everyone will realize I'm a fraud.
I see my college batchmates on LinkedIn, and they all seem so confident and successful. Meanwhile, I'm here, earning more than I ever thought I would, but feeling like I don't deserve any of it.
I can't even enjoy my success. I bought a nice house last year, but instead of feeling proud, I keep thinking, "What if they fire me tomorrow? How will I pay for this?" It's like I'm waiting for everything to come crashing down.
I know it's ridiculous to complain about a high-paying job when so many people are struggling. But this constant fear of being "found out" is driving me insane. I can't even talk to my friends about it because they'll probably think I'm just showing off.
Has anyone else felt like this? How do you deal with feeling like a fraud when everyone thinks you're successful? Is this just part of adult life that no one talks about?
This is what eats me alive during weekends, realised it's Friday and panic typed this here
Socrates: “I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing.”
It’s a very common phenomenon these days because of how much we have been able to achieve in such short timelines which has no parallel in our family or friends. It makes us doubt our capabilities. Maybe it’s true, maybe it’s not but what I have learnt as long as you are aware of your shortcomings and willing to learn, you will be okay.
And once in a while remember we are all going to die, soak in the success and enjoy the moment.
1st stanza last line ✨
Nice house, fat paycheck, and still feeling like a fraud? Sounds rough, bro. Maybe try crying into your piles of cash - I hear it's therapeutic.
Dude, you're not alone in this! Impostor syndrome is super common, especially for high achievers. Your success is legit - you've worked hard for it. Remember, feeling out of your depth often means you're growing. Most people feel like they're winging it sometimes, even if they look confident. Keep crushing it, and try to give yourself credit for how far you've come. You've earned your spot!
Not earning as much as you are. But I get you. I have the same feeling half the time. I feel like an imposter who just made it through with luck and no hard/valuable work.
Instead of feeling this anxiety everytime, I've decided to work on upgrading my skillset now. Courses, competitions etc. This helps build my confidence a bit.
I have a bunch of friends who have the same imposter syndrome. We all have different ways to deal with it.
Knowledge builds confidence.
Have you ever think how much company is earning and giving you peanuts. If you are thinking you are earning free money so i am sharing my assumption may be its correct may be its wrong but since our childhood we always surrounded by movies and we starts thinking like - Money can earn through hard work only. No employer is foolish and there are too many things considered like your Academics, your past company, your behavior otherwise a labour(Who build the house) Should earn atleast 1 Cr per annum because he is shakimaan
This guy thinks
Quite a lot!