BubblyBurrito

I find it so hard to spend on myself

I come from a poor background, but somehow I worked extremely hard and now I earn decently well (above 60 LPA cash).

My problem is- I don’t mind spending on others. In fact I don’t even think twice before taking my card out and buying things for family or friends. I have also lent money to multiple people when they are in need of help (total close to about 2-3 lakhs). But it doesn’t bother me even a bit. I don’t even care about whether I’ll get it back or not.

But, when it comes to me, I find myself struggling so much and questioning my decision to buy things even as cheap as INR 200-300. And most of the times I find myself going extra miles to save a few bucks. In fact, I also recently downgraded from a bigger to smaller apartment, because I have been doing so much maths around saving 7-8K a month.

Maybe there is some part of me that feels that I don’t deserve any of this.

Anyone has any idea how to fix this?

9mo ago

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SparklyBurrito

Amazon9mo

Nothing wrong, do you have peer pressure from family/frirends to save more than they are doing or do you have a number in mind to target (1cr/2cr)

maybe start by spending on things that you find value or improves your health/quality of life

BubblyBurrito

Stealth9mo

Actually no peer pressure. I save decently already. My portfolio has recently touched about 1.5 cr. I think I am trapped in this endless rabbit hole of wanting more. Few years ago, my target was to have 50 lakhs in bank, when i hit that, it changed to 1 cr. And now that i have surpassed it, I’m looking forward to more.
The thing is - I kind of feel embarrassed to call people at my home, because I literally have nothing. I don’t even have a work table/chair. And when I think of spending on them and on other things like furniture and all, I feel like they’re super unnecessary. I have even considered rentals, but then I end up computing the annual fee, and discard the plan.

BubblyBurrito

Stealth9mo

In fact, I recently got a bed because someone was selling it at cheap rate. Before that, I just had a mattress.

SillyPretzel

Stealth9mo

Get a girlfriend

GoofyBurrito

Stealth9mo

Lolol, Get a girlfriend and revisit this post after 6 months. Banda puchna start karega bc aur paisa kahase aayega suggest karo..

SillyPretzel

Stealth9mo

Yes, problem solved. A good partner would teach him to spend on himself and his lifestyle. Not extravagant spend per se.

GigglyRaccoon

Times Internet9mo

Do whatever good keeps you happy. I think there's nothing to worry, it would naturally come to you on how much you need to, how much to want to and how much you wish to spend on yourself.

Spend atleast to the level you can enjoy the kind of life you want to live given your current monetary income.

If spending a bit on yourself gives you substantially greater comfort, peace of mind and a sense of enjoying your time, given you can afford that expense, don't stop yourself. Spend it. It will help you gain a sense of fulfillment to an extent.

FluffyCupcake

Amazon9mo

Set certain % of earnings per month to yourself.
Make sure you use that money only on you.
Don’t live in regrets, few years down the line when you won’t have opportunity to spend.

SillyJellybean

Stealth9mo

Don't need to spend if you don't want to spend. Invest it and grow it so you can spend it on others and when you need to spend on yourself later.

There will be medical bills in the future, old age is a bitch. If you can grow that money well enough you can sponsor other old people in their retirement care too.

Sky is the limit with more money, it can be put to many good uses. I would say don't force yourself to spend on yourself if you don't actually need to.

Too many people get caught up in this habit of upgrading lifestyle even when not actually required. Those savings can be a lifesaver in times of need.

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