corporate law firm or military school?
I saw Oppenheimer recently, and there Oppenheimer had request the officials to have the families of the scientists come along (to a very secret, highly sensitive base for research of atomic bombs) because the scientists would need an environment that is conducive for their brain to work. Contrast that to my pretty regular law firm, why can’t my partners understand that the environment where a brain can function is not the environment of constant criticism? I have had my performance review and I have been scored well. I know that I am not stupid, I know that my work product, if not great, is decently good enough. But every time I have to talk to my partner/ PA on some work, I get a weird anxiety that what will I be yelled at for this time. I had been yelled at for reminding my partner of a deadline. After email the work product, sending a message on teams, I have been yelled at for not calling my partner up (wasn’t something pressing/ urgent deliverable). My seniors say that the trust me on my work. To me at least- Trust doesn’t mean I’ll give good work 100 times, trust means- one time if I don’t meet your expectations, you’ll trust to give me benefit of the doubt and not be schooled. It is a norm to long hours and it is a norm to work over the weekends. Then why am I made feel guilty if I wanna go home early (at 5/6 pm) one day? Why am I made feel guilty for asking for a leave?