I don’t know how to say this without sounding dramatic, but I’m genuinely not okay.

Firstly you have to start with being kind to yourself. You are an intern, you are learning stuff so you are bound to make mistakes thats why you are intern. Hell I make mistakes every now and then and I have been working for more than a decade. Mistakes/ Failures is how we learn. No one becomes a good sailor in a quiet sea.

Also its just a job, jobs come and go. Your work is just a part of your big life don’t make it your entire life. You wont even remember this 4-5 years down the line. So don’t stress, Just do what you can to best of your ability without putting pressure on yourself.
And let the rest of it go.

And for your seniors they probably are drowning too coz your workplace kinda feels toxic.
What works for me is when I feel tired, burnt out is to do what I enjoy outside work. It can be a small trivial thing as a walk in a park or watching reruns of your fav show. Just deep breaths when you feel world around you is crumbling.

As a fellow intern, I am facing EXACT same issues man 😭😭 trust me it feels so bad inside when you make a stupid mistake and it gets highlighted. Every morning I wake up with a fear that, did I forget to do something, did I finish that task, did I this, did I that etc.
I used to think I'm smart and fairly talented but now I often question myself am I really good enough 😔

“You are doing okay. Just breathe, bring out your beautiful smile, and carry on!” :)

Ok, looking at your post, I think the issue seems to be, you being overburdened with work, and not being guided properly, and lack of enough interaction further hitting at your work moral. You are feeling left alone, you make mistakes and you have no one to tell you that it is very normal to make those mistakes!

I don’t know it feels for interns, that too for non-tech, Tax Analyst kind of role, how does it feel, since I have never been, so this comment may be quite off the mark. But in my current organisation, interns just keep chilling around! Even in my previous organisation, they hardly seemed under pressure!
 — So first, it’s them, not you! You seem to be getting overburdened with challenging work, and lots of it, without adequate training provided.

— Second, as far as the overachiever, class topper aspect goes on, trust me, half of the people around here, must have been class topper at some point of time in their lives! It only takes time to make us realise how large this world is, and how smaller our worlds had been back then! So that shock process, is just the natural order of things. Life humbles us, just take it as a humbling experience, learn and keep moving ahead!

— Third, you seem to be saddened and dejected due to lack of enough interaction. Corporate life, at least initially, is expected to be full of enjoyment and fun. But here, may be you have lots of work, here you seem to be in competition to prove yourself without making any mistakes. So I think, first you need to take it a bit easy. In bigger MNCs, interns are highly likely to be given offer letter (or whatever it is called), so don’t come under pressure from that angle.
 Talking of interactions, have you considered that may be those other folks are scared, or hesitant to approach first due to your serious misdemeanour? I understand you may be introvert, or hesitant to ask for help, to avoid being judged as lacking knowledge and competence, but may be try starting small? Trust me, some people at work actually like folks who take genuine interest in asking work related questions. What I mean is, some people may not like a girl (or boy for that sake), but if that girl starts asking some genuine questions about work, those same people starts liking her, and not because of her beauty or something, but because of the earnest inquisitivenes for learning. And there are some other psychological aspects to it too, for example, people feel important when you approach them for help! 

Long and short, what I am trying to say is, approach people for help, ask questions about your work, start small and see how they respond. If you ask politely, most people will go out of their ways to help you. To most people, helping gives a sort of happiness and sense of fulfilling to, and your simple thanks, would mean the world to many. So just ask, just talk, just approach people around.

— You miss being proud of yourself? Oh, happens with the best of us, it is just a phase, you need to just weather it.
— Beautiful? It’s all in the minds, you just talk and smile, and the whole world will find you beautiful, and then you too will feel that beauty reflecting upon yourself. — Miss being seen? Oh well, I really doubt that you are not being seen! But I get it, you are missing the attention may be, so well, it is just work pressure, always happens in the initial phase of work with most, so just chill, put a chin up and move ahead, pretty sure you will feel being seen soon!

Eat well, do a quick morning jog in park where birds/peacocks fly and cats scurry around, join a Gym may be, or may be a Dance class if you like. And if you still feel under pressure, tell your city and I am sure friendly people from around will come rushing to give you company, to do morning jogging with you and to talk afterwards over a cup of tea!

Best Wishes!

I am from Tax and at AM position after working for 4+ years in Tax. I can get you, as I still feel the same even after 4+ yrs in tax. This industry as a whole is stressful and managers in Big 4 are not trained to be leaders, they are just shown how to extract the ones beneath them, so it's their go-to action to extract the happiness out of you instead of motivating you, or genuinely caring about your well being. My counselee who joined as an intern from Jain College last Jan, has put in his papers and I congratulated him for being able to take such a brave decision so early on in his career. If only, we could too...! Public Accounting is a miserable industry and India is hell for its toxic corporate culture.

@Thatcoolnerd Hey, You are just overwhelmed. That’s it.

While we all seek external validation but that should not be objective. Objective should the growth we see in ourself. Doesn’t matter what others says. Skill eventually trumps politics. When your abilities are high enough, favouratism become ineffective

My two suggestion are

• Keep working on yourself. You feeling not proud is okay, nothing wrong with that. This should give you motivation to work harder.
• Don’t seek external validation. If not in office, seek a mentor outside (Who is willing to help for free)

You’ll be alright. And truth to be told…you’re gonna feel this even when you are all grown up and doing well for yourself. It’s just that you have set a high bar for yourself and that’s good. That’s how you grow.

@IntrovertBeing My dumb brain can do this much only

Work on 2 levels.

1. Technical Aspects.

2. Managerial Aspects

Don't mix them. & Let ur manager know ur processing step wise.

Been through exact same situation and exact same background. Solved it with spirituality, breath work, meditation. DM if you’re interested to know more, ill help you out

You’re not tired. You’re underutilized in a system that fears your potential. They don’t guide you because they know — the moment you figure it out, you become a threat. So here’s the truth no one will say: stop asking for light in a room full of people who benefit from your darkness. Watch. Listen. Study their habits. Map their triggers. You’re not supposed to fit in — you’re meant to take over. Quietly. Strategically. Make them regret underestimating you. Not through words. Through calculated wins they didn’t see coming. There are a lot of ways to do that.

I know this feeling just way too well. During my internship as well as the first fulltime company, the work atmosphere was exactly this!

You need to pull the plug to maintain sanity brother. I had quitted those toxic places, I'd suggest you to do the same. Devote that time to healing and learning things on your own.

Apply to good companies later as full time

My experience with myself and a lot of people I have worked with has been that when the beginnings are tougher, the rest of the career has always been smoother. The vice versa is also true. People who have it easier in the beginning, often end up nowhere to be found. This reminds me of a set of girls who were chosen for a very mundane task of manual testing an application and were sent onsite to Switzerland in their very first year in the industry, while the rest of the overperforming, overachieving members of the freshers batch like me were left wondering what wrong did we do. They stayed onsite for at least three years. Now, although the word on the street was there was an element of 'glamour that was behind this sudden onsite deployment, who would ever know the real reason. Now, fast forward today, 14 years later, none of the girls is known about. No greatness achieved, no repute, no technical mastery, no fame. Just some financial gain which faded with time. We all on the other hand have become renowned masters of our trade.

Easier beginnings are dangerous. Harder ones are an Insurance for the future.