I'm 21 m. Had a 9 months old relationship with a girl who's 6 months older. It was the best 9 months of my life. We connected on so many levels that I never thought would happen with me at such a young age.
Recently, she broke up with me. It was not our mistake. Her mother isn't well (from a long time, and I knew that) and her last wish is to see her daughter getting married.
Forcefully, she had to admit this and told me everything. And told me that we need to end this.
It's been 3 weeks, and there's minimal contact between us.
I'm a final year college student, not getting placements, too much pressure from family. I can't think about anything. Feels like all of this is eating me up. We had very secure future plans, but everything is over now. I don't know what to do.
I try very hard to stay on track, but her thoughts are eating me up. I've started meditation, therapy and everything, but nothing is working the way I thought it would do.
She was the one that gave me assurance that everything will be fine. Her presence was the most peaceful thing I had, but now, there's nothing.
Help me, please.
PS: please don't judge me the way I am. I'm trying to be normal as much as possible but nothing's working.
Forget her friend, the girl who breaks up relationship isn’t worth it. Same applies for guys too who break up with their girlfriend. Just accept she is not worth it. When you will be 30-40 years old, and having a beautiful wife with arranged marriage and kids, you ll laugh at yourselves why the hell did you waste those 9 months with that girl. Colleges romances rarely work out. The earlier you accept, the better it will be.
Roka kar le bhai. Mummy bhi khush, matter bhi sorted.
Speak with you parents and get them to back you up. Why keep fighting a lonely battle in your head.
Listen to this on loop
https://youtu.be/VAvrPzPdSfo?si=TF_wyLL4HzdsEXaD
Work hard, life won’t stop for one person.
Hey @parallelMusk, I was in your exact shoes 7 years ago. It's strikingly similar – in fact, this feels surreal. I was 21 too, dating a senior in my final year of college. Around 7-8 months later, she called me and said she needed to end it because her parents were forcing her to marry a relative in the US.
Long story short, we broke up. I was heartbroken, and every single day was miserable and painful. I was even diagnosed with depression and underwent therapy.
I understand how you're feeling now, but I'm sure as a couple of months pass, you'll feel much better and eventually start to move on.
A couple of things that helped me leaps and bounds:
Do not worry; this too shall pass. You'll overcome this breakup and move on eventually. Time heals everything.
Be practical and think long term. Discuss with her first whether she sees herself in a marriage with you. If yes, try and talk to yours and hers family and work it out. If it doesn't work out, be ready to move on. It will be hard no doubt that. but not something which is impossible. You will bounce back. Have seen people break off years long good relationships and happily married to other people. Time is a big factor. Hope it helps.
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