Never met any relatives or school/college friends in different cities either?

Generalist

Software Developer

You and Girl 1 seem to be meant for each other

There is no such thing as meant to be imo. You will meet many such people through chance or accident in life. 
  
 Wanted to marry my exes, thought we were meant to be. Didn't work out 🤷‍♂️

Data scientist

Matched with a girl on hinge in Delhi NCR, turns out we already connected many years ago when I was in Mumbai, used to text then lost touch when I moved to Bangalore (never met). Now crossing paths...

Matched with a girl on hinge in Delhi NCR, turns out we already connected many years ago when I was in Mumbai, used to text then lost touch when I moved to Bangalore (never met). Now crossing paths in NCR again, maybe we actually meet this time.

Same thing happened with someone I dated briefly in Bangalore, turns out she moved to NCR as well few years ago. Planning to meet and catch up now.

Many more such friends and acquaintances i have in almost every part of India now. 

Makes me feel like the world isn't as big as it seems. It's mostly the same crowd moving between cities every few years.

Has this happened with you as well?

Bumping into old acquaintances from different cities is so weird and funny

Bumping into old acquaintances from different cities is so weird and funny- Grapevine

Welcome to Software Engineers's Private Community

Been in Bangalore for 6+ years and love everything the city has given me. 
This city ( more like people here) taught me what software engineering and product sense is, how to entrepreneurs function, whats a 100X coder like. 
Made many memories, weekend trips to nearby places were so nice. Dated, moved in and then married my girlfriend, adopted a dog. So Bangalore has given me a lot. 
But in hindsight it takes a way a lot also - 
1. Everybody is in constant work mode, even in parties its just about who is doing what
2. Everybody is in loot mode here - i have seen locals pay less for veggies/fruits in front of me, then the veggies apparently have lead in them
3. Rents/builders/brokers/roads - we all know whats up with them 

Though it was nice initially, now i feel like even after earning so much ( ctc > 1cr) if i just spend it all here ( monthly expenses ~2lacs same is with all my married friends), what is the point even.

Hence making a move to slow life now, where you get a house with garden for 25k and fresh veggies and you can actually develop some relationship with community. 

This urge to always outperform in career is not really needed, we all eventually work towards savings and hence if i earn less but spend even lesser, its more or less the same thing for me.

But i dont want to live in a matchbox, travel 1 hour to meet a friend, eat a roti for 150bucks and be in constant anxiety about climbing the ladder. 

All i want is to focus on health, and sit in a garden in some sunshine with my wife and my dog and enjoy a cup of tea. 

So yes, I AM DONE. Moving to a tier 2 ( more like tier 2.5 town ) 

Happy to answer any questions if anybody has any.

Done with Tier1 cities, moving to tier 2 town with family - A rant

Software Engineer

Hi, I have been on a permanent wfh role and I feel I have 0 social life and that’s damaging. Would love to connect offline with folks from delhi on common interests. Leave your email id if you’re interested and we can plan something!

0 Social Life

Operations Manager

Welcome to Ask Grapeviners's Private Community

Probably most of you people might have used dating apps and there is no way that you have not had such an incident while using dating apps, so spill the tea and entertain everyone on the weekend😂.
I will go first:
So when I installed the dating app for the first time, I had no idea what to write in the bio, so I changed the looking for filter to man and women both and I started swiping left on men but was seeing what they are writing in bio and after some time I closed the app and forgot to change the filter and after 1 day I found out that I had 83 right swipes on my profile. Now I am scared that I hope no one of my knowing would have seen my profile warna gay samjne lagege😭

P.S. I used to use this question as an ice breaker and the response rate was 100%😂

Whats your weirdest or funniest dating app incident?

I am doing work from home from last 2 year and it's pretty good

but my entire friend circle has moved to their office location delhi, blr aur Bombay and my college friends also got split into different cities

Sure, we catch up during occasional visits or hometown hangouts and trips, but most days, it's just me, myself, and my laptop. I've tried moving to Bangalore and stayed couple of months, but traffic take lot of time to just meet  friends and people are mostly into over work and then just drinking and smoking and don't want to talk about flats, transport and other problem

so whoever doing work from home from their hometown, how do you deal with this

my hometown is tier 3 city and routine is kind of wake up, coding, gym, movies or anime or leetcode and sleep

How to deal with wfh

Moved to Bangalore, now where/How do I meet new people, make friends and learn from all the people around me.

Moved to Blr, now what?

I'm at that age where is tremendous pressure to get married. Can't even put in words the kind of torture I go through every day. I'm a woman. I have met people mostly through AM set up. I didn't click with anyone. I don't have faith that I'll be anyone compatible through AM route. Tried dating app, quickly realised it's not for me, the compatibility is even worse there. I go to events and such, didn't really meet anyone. Idk if it's just the Kannada culture, everyone is just so shy! I enjoy being by myself but would prefer being with a partner. I realise the importance of having a companion. At the same time, I also don't want to just get married to someone for the sake of it. 

So Bengalurians, especially Kannadigas, where did you meet your partner/SO/spouse? 

What is something I should be doing that I'm not doing?

On the work front, I'm doing quite well. Looks wise too, I don't think I'm ugly.

Bangalore folks, and particularly Kannadigas, where did you find your partner?

Medical Expert

Welcome to Product Managers's Private Community

I have a job that offers a permanent WFH. I am not married and want to spend the next 12 months working out of different places around the country. Looking for suggestions where I can 
1. Work for 8-10 hrs, 5 days a week
2. Good WiFi
3. Healthy homemade food

Work from Anywhere

Product Manager

Welcome to Office Gossip's Private Community

I understand the concept of this app is to stay anonymous and discuss news related to work and the economy but HEAR ME OUT what if…. 

We have small meet-ups like people who are in the same city who are interested to catch up and do things. Most of the people working in places like BLR / Pune / Mumbai etc.  are more often than not people who come from other places. Freshers don’t really have a circle here to do things with. So if people are interested to unmask themselves and meet up with each other do you think that would be a good idea?

I know this sounds like a cringe or crazy idea but hear me out

Assistant Manager

- Met bunch of nicest humans. People are the best thing about Bangalore (after weather ofc)
- The weather though 🤌🏻 
- Was lucky enough to get autos and cabs on time, no cancellations (ok maybe just 1), the drivers were sweet too. 
I messed up location once, the auto driver said no problem madam. Next time, cab driver stopped me to ask for 5 star rating. 😅
- Had the bestest Dosa ever at MTR. Why are you not hyping this? This deserves more love than any other
- Finally ticked Magnolia off list. Just too sweet!! how are Bangaloreans having this level of sweet and not gaining weight?? 🤔 🥲
- The entrepreneurial spirit of Bangalore is contagious. 
- Do all startup bros talk in abbreviations? I felt too old for the generation really

Bangalore chronicles end 😪

Consultant

How you guys are spending this weekend? 

For me, I am traveling, so spending some time at airport. Amazed to see volume of passengers even in a Tier2 city, for sure boost to indigo top line😯

Weekends for GVers

I was in a remote job from 2020, until last year where I was laid off in November. Then when I started searching for new companies my priority was to work on site, but again I got a remote job.
My problem is living in the house 24*7 make it dull after sometimes and you forgot the line between personal life and work life. All I did was waking up in the bed and then opening laptop and vice versa in the night. Plus you don't have social interaction. Now I have become an introvert living in my own room and it takes enormous energy to go out and meet people. Is remote job really worth it wasting my 20's sitting in the home ? 
How are you folks coping up with this thing?

Is remote job better than WFO

Frontend Engineer

Want to move away from hookups to dating but everyone is just to hookup on dating apps. Really how should i kill time here? Doing gym for 4 hours currently but getting bored. Thinking of trying swimming.

What do you do to kill loneliness in hyd or blr? Cafe or pub runs, gym, dating, hookups?

AI Engineer

In the first place, adult friendships made in office seem so superficial to me. You spend so much of your time with them, you mistake proximity for compatibility. 

I've made only two friends who I consider true friends here in 2 years, but only one of them considers me a true friend back. The other lady leans on me as an emotional crutch, but will hopefully forget about me when her life gets on track.

Touching grass, meeting people and all is fine, but how do people connect? 

Moving from a academic setting to a professional setting in a completely new city has been very challenging. The social protocols are different. Many adults are hurt, and stressed and don't allow friends to come close. 

Maybe I am painting the entire world in the colour my eyes see, but I really want to hear your stories!

How did you make friends when you moved to a new city?

Internal Audit

Anyone else feeling lonely in today’s world?
Shifted recently to a different city?
Don’t have many friends?
Let’s connect!!

Loneliness?

Visual designer

I'm 25 and it's fuking lonely on the weekends. I stopped initiating meetups, afraid they might be busy, now I spend the weekends alone in my room. I live with my family, but now l'm fuking fed up of living in the same house as them. They don't understand anything, just act and talk as if they know everything about me. I don't have enough money to live with other people on rent, nor I am able to find a job in another city. I hate myself and my fuking life. I wish I could do something other than shouting whenever my parents all to me.

Sometimes what I think about the EY employee who died, she is lucky she's in a better place now.

Loneliness

Data analyst

I'm 24 yrs old girl. For the past few months, I have been struggling with anxiety and loneliness in Bangalore.

I have tried everything in my knowledge and reach. 

I tried reaching out to people in the office which is tough because mostly are from either Andhra or WB or Karnataka, which makes it tough to fit in as they have their own groups and communicate in their native languages as they connect more.

I tried bumble bff as well. But had no success girls are unresponsive and guys use it similar to date mode.

I tried reaching out to my existing friends who live far away too but it became tough to meet them.

I also tried to get relocated to some other city from my office, but my request got rejected.

I am not a very social person, but I do want to make friends and I'm trying too but it's just not happening for me, organically or otherwise.

Any suggestions or reaching out is appreciated

Struggling with loneliness

In the Blr since a month, in the Marathalli area.

Not any friends nearby.
First time out of home town.

Not any friends in the company as well, mostly I sit alone just casual hi hellos. Don't drink or party hence just stuck in PG.

I want to network with people and find interesting startups.
Can even start doing something on the side.

Let's connect if you are around ?
What other ways you guys connect to people / make friends after getting into corporate !!

What do you do on weekends ?

I saw a friend tweet about how Bangalore is full of connected but lonely people jumping in to join every Meetup/WhatsApp group that becomes available. This is my problem with the meetup / conference culture. Meetup culture is all about optionality. You think you'll meet someone new who's cool. Someone who can help you build your network. 

You would rather join a meetup with 100 other strangers than build stronger connections with your friends. In life there are only a few people who really matter. 

People who you can call at 11 PM to rant about your workday. People who you know will be genuinely happy about your promotion. People you share screenshots from work with. It is not probably the 100 strangers in that Whatsapp group that you think of when you are having a health issue and want to share your fears. It also means lowering your ego, which I'm happy to do with my old friends. I'm always happy to ping them when I get the chance, and I'm the one asking them to call me. 

I'm the one who asks them to hang out with me. I used to think, "Why bother?" but then I realised that it doesn't matter who reaches out first. It is not about keeping a count. 

I realised it's for me! If I have a chat with a friend of mine who I have known for over 10 years, my mood improves immediately. Everyone is very busy. Everyone is stressed with their jobs and their personal lives. Some of them are married now. Some have children. But that's where you've got to work to keep connecting with the people who matter to you. Friendship is also about being vulnerable. True friendship is built on vulnerability. 

Being able to share your dreams, your failures and your demons with each other. While the meetup culture is all about bumping into people for 5 minutes to judge their worth and whether they are worth your time, my preference is for long 1-1s. Either on the phone or face to face. I am happy to meet just one person over the weekend and have hours of conversation about work, life or wha

Connected by Lonely in Bangalore (viral online post)

Business Development Manager

Holi hai? Diwali hai? So what, nothing to enjoy. Lets spend the day laying on the bed, watching stuff over phone. Feeling less and less disconnected with friends, to the point where I feel I don't even have friends. College friends are based in another city. Didn't even try to make friends at workplace. Stuck alone in my homecity as past 6 years I was based somewhere else completing my grad and preparing for jee. Prior to that focused a lot on studies. So had little to no interaction with people during academics. And now when I have time and money to spend, there is noone with whom I can have fun with.

Bumping into old acquaintances from different cities is so weird and funny

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