Used to feel the same and I realised that I need to either get a therapist or practice mindfulness.  
  
 Headspace subscription was much cheaper than a therapist and it helped me a lot.

Thanks for your reply. I also used Headspace and Calm apps but felt it got a bit repetitive, so I am using Waking Up by Sam Harris as of now. Do you meditate daily and how long till u saw some positive effects?

Software Engineer

Product Manager

Visiting a psychiatrist always helps, even if you don't plan on taking medication for anxiety!

I feel I am constantly overthinking about the future and getting anxiety and stress. I feel I imagine the worst case scenarios and fall into a spiral. I am trying journaling and meditation but I am...

I feel I am constantly overthinking about the future and getting anxiety and stress. I feel I imagine the worst case scenarios and fall into a spiral. I am trying journaling and meditation but I am not able to do it for longer than a week or two. Does someone have any experience in reducing these feelings and having a calmer mind?

Dealing with anxiety and stress about the future?

Dealing with anxiety and stress about the future?- Grapevine

I haven't been doing mentally well since I don't know when. I've  been extremely self critical about myself to the extent that it has negatively affected my relationship with loved ones. I think I have ADHD as I strongly feel I have the symptoms that are described in YouTube or in any article online. To make matters worse, I am not doing well in terms of my career, my finances have taken a hit, have gained 12+ kilos since a year, unable to focus on work and upskilling and I have anger issues. 
I am 30 YO and I feel my life is turning into a disaster.
Can someone please recommend therapists in Bangalore to whom I can talk face to face? 
I sometimes feel I'm seeking sympathy but in reality, I just need help.
There is a lot of guilt, regret and self hatred rooted deep inside me which has wrecked my confidence, self love, compassion which has started to affect others.
So if you guys know anyone, please let me know.

Need recommendations for therapists in Bangalore

Product Designer

For a while now I've been trying to become more self aware, wary of my own patterns, triggers. Trying to see things for what they are. This feels like a good starting point. People who have changed and improved this aspect of their life please share some suggestions that worked for you.

How do I become more present and not worry about past/future/other distractions?

Software Developer

Started meditating now and use my Apple Watch for guidance. 

I wonder what other people are doing. Because I’m having some rough nights sleeping in due to anxiety.

Avoiding anxiolytics or beta blockers for now. Also avoiding a mental health therapist for as long as I can.

[Thread] How do you deal with stress?

Welcome to Software Engineers's Private Community

Recently i had changed my job, previously WFH now new job WFO. I constantly feel that i may loose my job and i had to take some medicine for this as well. Doctor told me i was having pessimistic thinking and was depressed. I am the sole earning memeber of my home, 23 father dead, mother remains ill. Sister small in college.

I am in constant fear and this thing is eating me alive.

I am in constant fear.

For the last 2 months I have been trying to go to the gym and take care of my health but every week something or the other comes up and I'm working more than 14+ hrs sometimes. 12 hrs is average.


Every time something is going on in my mind around my work or performance or layoffs and a lot of things.  

I'm frustrated. Can somebody tell me what should be the best way to handle this?

Because of this I have high anxiety and also not getting proper time for personal life. 

I also feel a lot demotivated sometimes , thinking that why I'm working till 2am and for what?

Frustrated and Stressed: Mind Fog

Data engineer

Hi folks,
I recently got laid off from a startup where 50% of the engineering team was let go. I was working as an SDE and during a restructuring, my role was changed to SDE-2 without any increase in pay or responsibilities. I have a total of 2.5 years of experience. In my first company (where I worked for a year), there weren't many projects, so I didn't have the opportunity to learn or code much. However, in my second company, I primarily worked on the backend using Go, Django, Kafka, MongoDB, & PostgreSQL.
I realize that although I gained exposure in my second job, I didn't delve deeply into the technologies. I mainly focused on completing business tasks quickly, learning new things just to finish the task at hand, without solidifying my understanding afterward.
My experience seems suitable for an SDE-2 role, but I'm unsure if I can perform the role with complete honesty and may struggle. Some friends in similar situations reassure me that this struggle is common in SDE-2 roles. However, I feel I might be better off starting again as an SDE-1, focusing on my weak areas, and aiming for a promotion later. There are very few SDE-1 job openings currently.
I am actively interviewing for SDE-2, and not able to clear system design interviews. Tbh, I feel very humiliated as when I am not able to answer their questions it feels like I am wasting their time or they would be thinking: Oh this guy has been working for so long and doesn't even know anything.

Now I get it why people think Indian Software engineers are not that good in comparison to other countries' devs: the reason is people like me. 
This realization burdens me with guilt, occupying my thoughts constantly. However, I am confident that I can crack SDE-1 easily. I have good DSA & good enough LLD, &HLD skills for SDE1. I am looking for companies who can match my prev Salary: 22 L, 2 Bonus.
Can u help how to navigate this career situation effectively without increasing my guilt or feeling constantly humiliated?

Laid Off | Stuck Now | Too Anxious | Please guide

First work on the feeling of humiliation and self worthlessness. Don't ignore this, I've done it and it's one of my biggest regret. Working on this will feel a waste of time initially given job search is highest priority, I assure you your future self would thank you.  
  
 Now you are clearly very self aware, most incompetent people don't even know their shortcomings. And you know what, many comparatively incompetent people are making much more money, having much less self doubt and just living more - it's like being more self aware is a curse.  
  
 How do you get out of this curse? It's a slow process. Write down the things that make you feel that way, come up with an an action plan on what you could do to reduce that - clear goals and actions always relive anxiety. Writing things down is extremely important, keep coming back to it whenever you feel the same way, eventually you would reason your way out of this. Most of the time you are in a loop, living in guilt and self doubt for the same reasons over and over. Documentation of these feelings over time will make it look so silly, how could the same problem give you so much mental pain again and again.  
  
 You will do just fine career wise. With a few more years of experience, I can guarantee you will evolve over time, the problems giving you so much mental pain would seem very trivial then - that if you are able to resolve these feelings - otherwise it's a hell I wouldn't want for my worst enemies.  
  
 Some questions to ponder over -  
 1. Can you do the job search while being just a little gentle on yourself? 
 2. Does failure mean you have no worth? Can you fail more gracefully?  
 3. Does 2.5 years of mistakes(even if it see that way) mean you can't do amazing things in coming years? 
 4. Above all, does feelings of humiliation and worthlessness help you in any way? If nothing else changes, wouldn't it be better to just be a little gentler on yourself? 
  
 Take care, you don't have a career problem, a mental health one instead

Welcome to Office Gossip's Private Community

Hi Guys, I'm an SDE and I have this weird problem where I stress too much when some work is given to me which I don't understand.

Basically I'm not scared of high workload, as long as I know how to do it. Because then I know IT WILL BE DONE, I just have to work to finish it.

But when I get stuck on a problem, I DONT KNOW IF IT WILL BE DONE, I just keep thinking about it even if I close my laptop. The more I think, the more scary the problem becomes and then I start thinking if it continues and I'm not able to deliver more work, I might get fired and then during background verification for the next company, they will see I was fired and then no one will hire me. Basically my thoughts spiral out of control and make my life miserable to the point where I don't feel hungry.

If I'm confident I'm very confident, I feel like i can do any problem but when I see myself failing multiple times, i lose my mental strength

I need help and I want to improve this nature, not get stressed when things go south. Do you guys feel the same or know how to handle it

Any books or words of wisdom or thought process that you follow which helps you deal with job related work stress will be extremely helpful.

Strange work anxiety

Welcome to IT Company Discussion's Private Community

I am getting irritated with small small issues/mistake by my Team or by me. 
How to develop thick skin in IT world? What should be my thinking?

Sorry, last year I came from a very small town to Pune. 
Here people have thick skin to all the mistakes they do, or the mistakes done by management.
Also people are carefree for any work pressure . 

While me get into anxiety in everytime. 

How to be a strong mental person in so much chaos.

How to be mentally strong while working under pressure.

Senior Associate

As the title says. 

I have tried many methods of dealing with procrastination to code, there is always a constant fear of not being consistent, plus programming doesn't come easy to me or rather I don't have the grit to do it. I have seen other college mates grinding their ass off to DSA, how do I go past the stage of fear of feeling dumb and procrastination? Anytime I try to sit to do anything I immediately get this wave of overwhelming anxiety, I then start scrolling on my phone to get rid of the feeling. I can't even sit properly on a chair for long - yeah call me COVID kid or something but this has been the case for years. I only manage to do work/study at the very last moment but programming isn't like that, it takes consistent efforts. Are there any methods to achieve it?

P.S. hard scolding or stern answers are also welcomed, really want to improve myself.

How do you deal with procrastination?

Today i have gone to doctor as i have headache and little bit of dizziness. She said i got anxious all the time. It is kind of true. But i dont know how to rectify those anxiousness.

For example, i am going get a project where i dont how to work on backend project wrt testing. I got anxious. I got anxious while driving that i have to drive safely. I dont have to go for over speed limit. Even if i pick up tea cup i got anxious that tea should not be spilled on floor.

I have remote job and work is chill. But anxiousness always finds a way in my routine. Due to that i am getting high blood pressure. I am also walking daily except this week due to sickness. 

Any idea how to be less anxious in every work.

I am anxious all the time

As asked in the title. During office timings, I am really anxious to the point that I am unable to relax during lunch breaks as I am afraid I will get a message or a call that I might have to jump into. I know it sounds stupid, but I spend nearly 10 hours everyday with crippling anxiety. It has become so bad, I am considering quitting to work on myself just to get rid of this anxiety. However the Current market scenario doesn't allow me to me do this. I have asked my friends and family about this, but everyone says 'don't quit', 'work hard' Etc. I am sick of hearing this.

How do you deal with the crippling anxiety for WFH?

Project Manager

A mist this market lay off’s i am constantly in stress and anxiety. Am i the only one who feels this way. 
How do i cope up with this? Any help suggestions

Constant anxiety and stress

External Audit

Welcome to Business Roles's Private Community

I'm typing this out as a way of collecting my thoughts and feeling a bit normal to take myself through the day. Context: I have been working with a small b2b IT firm for the last 1.5 years, and resigned yesterday. This was my first job straight out of MBA and it has sucked the soul out of me to say the least. The notice period is 3 months and I am really unsure how will I survive it considering that I'm already completely drained. 

I do not want to list out the reasons of how this place has been toxic for me because I also carry a lot of self doubt if it was really the toxicity of the place or my own incapability to handle the work. I do not have any offer in hand, and haven't started a job search either. Just wanted to put this out there to see if people here in the community have been in a similar situation in their professional lives and how did they figure out the uncertainty, was it a good decision for them in retrospect and if they have any tips for me to deal with this better, with less anxiety.

Panic after resigning from a toxic workplace

First of all congratulations! You're out of that hell hole how and you can now recover and realign.  
  
 Second - You'll be okay. Anxiety tricks you into thinking the worst possible thing will happen to you. It convinces you that it's the only possible outcome.  
  
 I'd say the first couple of days - just be. Do what you want. Decide that in the first week you'll consciously do nothing job related - the one you left and the one you should find. You'll need this time to feel like yourself again. Do things that bring you calm and joy. Nothing to big, could be as simple as a walk or making your favourite kind of sandwich.  
  
 After a week - do the following things : 
 1. List out every single thing you did at this job  
 2. Use this info to update the CV - it'll take multiple iterations. Send it to people for feedback, ask them to be candid, use chatgpt whenever relevant  
 3. Make a list of companies you want to work with  
 4. Visit their portal and other job portals 
 5. Find relevant jobs  
 6. Find people in your circle who can refer you. If you do not know any reach out to people on LinkedIn. Send request to multiple people to have a big top of the funnel  
 7. Simultaneously write down questions that you might be asked in an interview 
 8. Meet people you like  
 9. Do some kind of work out 
 10. Apply to jobs with referal 
 11. Repeat  
  
 Remember - you'll be okay.

Growth And Strategy

What methods do you have for coping with anxiety?

Want to get some perspective here because I think it’d be valuable to hear about other people’s experiences.
This job at Google has completely destroyed my confidence and I feel so paranoid about shipping anything now.
I have made some mistakes but I have always caught them in staging or working drafts.

Here is what my manager has said to me:
- I lack attention to detail.
- I do not have drive.
- I do not have any ambition.

And the reason I have been told this is because:
I messed up a flow that the Lead PM had come up with in the first place. Then the Lead PM flips back on me and says that it would be "an embarrassment" to ship this.

I find myself immersed in a constant cycle of spending hours each day reviewing work, gripped by the fear of facing criticism or even the prospect of being fired. Despite investing significant time and effort, it seems that the only feedback I receive is overwhelmingly negative. It has reached a point where I question myself and wonder if I should have not been here at all. This toxic work environment is undeniably draining, and I'm left grappling with insane anxiety. Has anyone else faced this?

Dealing with anxiety and stress about the future?

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