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Do you guys feel the same?

I went and asked my lead to give some task, they delegated me to some other lead, the other lead said kal release hai dekhte hai kuch aaya toh de denge warna theek Now here I am anxious about not getting a task, I don't know how to kill time, I get tensed of not having a task. Is it just me? I don't understand when you get a task, again you are tensed about the deadlines, if you don't get a task you are tensed This is a vicious cycle, how to break this?

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Software Engineers on

by PickleRick313

Student

Am I a bad engineer?

Long post ahead!!! Its been around a year since I've started working in a service based company as a Frontend dev, WLB, compensation and all is good based on I've just started. During this year of working I do not feel like I've done anything, our team is working on a product for past 2-3 year and its nearing the completion. My role was mostly to cordinate with testing team and solve frontend bugs and minor addition to the project (which was mostly copy pasting), even doing these minor task took me some time initially and I still have to take help from seniors time to time. I got kinda bored with all the repetitive task and I requested my manager to assign me to other development happening within team, he agreed and assigned me some different task but I cant seem to understand anything here, I get stuck in the most basic things, I feel stupid when I am not able to come up with easy solutions. I am seeing other engineers learning new tech stacks in a small amount of time and getting hold of it while i am not able to understand things in my own tech stack. I've recently gotten a appraisal as well(my company is quite good and gives it to everyone) and I feel like I don't deserve a bit of it. I am a 2023 graduate , I did MCA because that was the only good option I could see for myself(mostly cz of money) at that time earlier to that I did a bachelor's (Non CS) without gaining any knowledge of anything. My basics are not that good, In college my only focus was to get a job so I did DSA and some front-end development using ReactJS(projects mostly code along with ytube) to be able to grab a good placement. Is software engineering not for me? If no, then how do I overcome this, i don't wanna be a mediocre.