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What to do when your Manager is taking mental peace

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What to do when your Manager is taking mental peace- Grapevine

Welcome to Office Gossip's Private Community

Currently working for Foreign Startup, under a Indian Engineering Manager.

Manager is incompetent, doesn't like disagreemets. If you disagree with him, then he goes to length to make your life diffult. Already seen few examples in the team. 

There are red flag all over the place. I'm not sure how upper management is not able to catch him. He does the politics, favoritism, etc...

List goes on and on. Any help would be appreciated.

P.S Don't want to leave the company in this market.

How to Deal with Toxic Manager

Software Engineer

How do i convince my manager to get release from current project if it is giving me mental pressure?

Convince manager to get release

Analyst

So, my boss is an absolutely lovely person, and is the best boss I've had so far. Not to brag, but I'm also the best performer in my team, by a mile. So, while I do get my pats on the back, I'm also rewarded with more and more work. I love, atleast so far, what I do, so I didn't mind taking up more work, because I learnt a lot in the process too, and it helped my hone my craft better.

Cut to now, I'm losing interest in work. Don't feel like taking up any new work, no matter how exciting the brief, or how great its potential.

I feel like I'm burnt out. And majorly demotivated.

What makes it worse is seeing this other member in my team chill the absolute fk out. He's hardly even given any important projects because of what a waste resource he is.

I've also just been promoted. So, I'm not sure if I should share what's on my mind with my boss.

My mind says I shouldn't, but my heart says it should be fine.

What should I do about:
1. Telling or not telling my boss what I'm going through (because I'm scared if it'll come back to bite my later)
2. Me feeling extremely burnt out and demotivated.

Drop in a joke or two, if you want, but please drop in a serious and genuine reply too.

Should I tell me boss I'm burnt out?

No, please dont in my opinion. Are you not taking leave’s? Please take leaves. 
  
 It might be contradictory on what i said but when it comes to bosses, it better not to talk about burning out and demotivated etc. 
  
 If you still want to do, sound as positive as you can be.  
 Boss sab ka bharosa nahi yaar.

Marketing Creative

How many escalations have you had , I'm on 2. Working on two projects simultaneously and I'm just behind on both of those , I'm a fresher , I told my manager that I don't have bandwidth but he said that take responsibility and finish it? I don't know what to do anymore ?

How to navigate this situation

So, I'm a graduate from BBA and I'm working with a small to medium sized organization with around 200 people.

I'm a guy.

It's in Education Sector.

I joined right after my graduation. The first year, I did nothing so I was given a formality hike of 5k. They offered me 20k initially p.m.
Now my 2nd year working here is completed so now, I have done more than 25 major roles which no one can do.

That makes up work of more than 20+ people.

Now that i asked for a raise, they are saying they are in losses and they don't have the budget and shit.

The only reason I'm working here is that I love the Manager aka Director.

He has been like a mentor, when I was facing hardship, he has given me money without even a second thought.

I have been discussing this with him.

Now he was saying the organization might increase my salary to 30k. I'm like the fuck are you even speaking.

I really don't wanna leave the organization because of this person at the same time I don't wanna stay in an organization which doesn't give an absolute crap about me.


Please tell me what shall I do.

These are the points I raised:

1. I need to get paid for the value I give. I have done more than 20+ peoples works. Even if you hire some incompetent people, the time, value and efforts would cost more than to pay me.

His counter: Treat this organization as a cost-cutting and work with me on other businesses and which he offered me to compensate with if I work there

My thought: if I work here, and get compensates there. What about the work do there? How will I be compensated?

2. We are ready to pay more to people who do jackshit work but we have policies to people who actually do work?
They have gone over the budget for people who talked big and did absolute shit.

His counter: We are in losses and we might not have the budget

My thought: So we are doing cost cutting by hiring shitty people for more money and compensating it by paying the valuable people jackshit?

Please help me

Thanks!

Folks: Work Related Advise Needed Help!!

I am new in a team and got a story assigned to me on Thursday afternoon. It was Friday morning and my manager was almost forcing me for 5-6 times to send the update on the story to client. As I work on VDI and it's too too slow, I was unable to go through the story properly, so forcibly, I had to send incorrect updates to client, to which they asked questions to my manager. 
And suddenly my manager's Second face revealed, and he asked me in the group "why did you send this incorrect update? You should have asked someone in team first. " (while he didn't give me some time to check with someone in team and forced me in the standup call to send updates at that time) and I was shocked, how this man turned his face within minutes!!!! When I justified my point, he started taunting me in the group chat, started argument and almost blamed me and shared the whole discussion to his manager and acted innocent. 
How these managers are so ruthless and double faced??
I am feared he would not approve my 1 week leave, I am planning to take during Dussehra or would give bad rating.

Should I stay strong or apologize (even though I am not wrong )? 

Please suggest what should I do now???

Had argument with manager

Software Developer

Welcome to Indian Startups's Private Community

I’m done from this work! How do you folks deal this?

How many of your manager has mood swings issues?

Welcome to Mental Well-being's Private Community

Hi all ,

I feel zoned out during office hours.Then I have to sacrifice my weekend to complete the remaining work as there will be status meeting in the next week.Im completely lost since last one month. Currently I'm working in autosar(application layer), but I feel like switching my career into full stack development.I find no balance in work neither in learning.My social circle is messed up , I hardly interact with people around me.

Mental instability at work

My new manager at a new company works on weekends too. Comments in documents, sends mails and a bunch of other stuff. Sends mail at fucking 4 & 5 in the morning.

I feel pressured to work on weekends too because he is working. I'm already clocking 10 hour work days. How to deal with this situation?

About me - PM at startup.

Manager works on weekends

Stop it at the start. Don't put yourself out there, so they start considering your extra effort as normal or default.  
  
 Shut the laptop on Friday and open it only on Monday. Don't follow up on weekends which might become a habit and they expect you to respond on weekends. 
  
 Until they don't ask you, you don't respond. Also there could be multiple reasons why they prefer to work during certain times. 
  
 Once you break the boundary you have, there's no way getting it back again.

Product Manager

I have been suffering from work related anxiety for the last 3-4 months. I have recently started taking medications for it. I am supposed to move to Bengaluru as my wfh has ended. My parents think it's a good idea as it will help change my environment. I am wondering if it's a good idea to share about it at my workplace with my manager/superior. I know it's subjective, but still. Because I am worried this has started to affect my performance. Also, I am a talkative and emotional person and may end up slipping these things anyway.

Informing manager / superior about anxiety

Don't share this with anyone in workplace unless you really trust your manager who you know will always have your back 
  
 But please start seeking therapy regularly and actively, and do have faith in the process. You'll be available to cope with it better hopefully

Program Manager

Welcome to Software Engineers's Private Community

So I might get some hate for this. I know this is weakness and the feedback I've gotten is toughen up. But I've never known how.
 Is there anyone else whose body and mind had accepted that they're not going to amount to anything but fought their way through it? Can you tell me your story? Or give me any book suggestions?

I shut down under pressure

My advice is simple. Spite. Hate the situation so much that you come out of that, or conquer it with pure spite. The Hatred of ever being found in such a situation will propel you towards success.

For context: Weekends are off. So just fri WFH. This is a Series B startup. I am not even asking for a leave but WFH for just 1 day. I joined recently. The only thing I did wrong was possibly informing a little too late.

Want to get opinion if I am overthinking or this classifies as toxic culture in startups where you are expected to push limits above and beyond regularly and sometimes weekends.

---

Is this toxic work culture or I am overthinking

Not a great culture, also you don’t have to give the actual reason, instead say due to some unavoidable work or family health reason you will need to wfh. Its a good way of seeing what kind of employer one is, when they also treat urgencies like that. Indians feel they need to give a detailed explanation as to why they deserve wfh or leave, whereas in international companies, you just have to inform the manager.

Senior Designer

Growth Manager

Have recently started noticing a bunch of times that my manager leaves me out of meetings where key decisions are taken, related to the work that I only have done. 

I get to know this because I stalk their Google Calendar. It’s just weird. I’m not insecure or anything, I’ve been mostly rated well. It’s just odd. 

This just didn’t happen before and lately has started.
Anyone faced this and knows how to address it?

My manager is leaving me out of key meetings

Is it worth resigning without having a job? I am very frustrated with the amount of toxicity I am going through from the last few months, My teammate is trying their level best to frustrate me and doing politics. What should I do suggest?

Business Analyst

Welcome to Data Scientists's Private Community

I just found out today I’ve been cheated on by my long term girlfriend who I lived with. Turns out she’s been cheating for a few months but she’s only just told me now because she’s fallen out of love for me and she’s fallen in love with him, so she’s leaving me for him.

She says I neglected giving her the attention she needed because I was so focused on work I forgot to do the nice things for her like bring her flowers, or take her out for dinner or to just show her how much I loved her.

Even though I’m so heart broken and haven’t stopped crying, I do forgive her because it’s true my work hours were bad and because we lived together I kept thinking in my head “it’s fine, ill make it up to her next time”. 

Plus, I was planning to quit my job once bonus comes at the end of this year to find a more chilled job so I could spend more time with her, I truly am ready to leave my job and that was my plan so I was just holding out until then. But now I won’t have the chance because she said its too late she has already lost interest in me and loves him.

But this guy is a software engineer at a FAANG company earning 60-70L a year whilst only having to work 9-5 so he’s richer and has more free time to give her attention. Actually she said he only works around 3 hours per day, he does around 1 hour in morning then 2 hours after lunch and for the rest of the day he’s free to spend time with her, and his company doesn’t notice or mind. So this guy earns almost 3x my compensation for only 3 hours a day meanwhile I’m working 12 hours a day 

She would sneak out whilst I was at work to go on dates with him or round his house and then she would come back to my home in my bed in time for when I arrived from work so I wouldn’t notice. 

Now I feel really broken, I’m in no mental state to be working I can’t think about anything else I have deadline for work today and I’m just sat here crying writing this post. I know men are meant to be strong and hold our emotions together but I really am sad.

I want to ask for 3 days sick leave at work but I don’t know if this normal and acceptable to do? Given most sick leave would be for grievances like the death of a loved one etc.

or am I being a cry baby and I should man up and continue to work?

Data Scientists on Grapevine: Should I Ask For Sick Leave After Being Cheated On

Stop comparing yourself with the new guy, take a few days off and go on a vacation. Given that she lived with you, it must be a strong connection which would take quite a long time to wear off. You'll learn to live with it in a few months. All the best and take care

I have one question for everyone. How do you resolve your issues if you have issues with your manager or lead? 
Or How do you build a trust if the trust is broken because of some delayed work, wrong work, wrong design, or something you did wrong in the past and he/she still judges you based on that but you're now doing better?

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