Why doesn't anything feel worth it anymore

I have been a little caught up with numerous things in my life lately and have finally found some free time to open up myself to new experiences. I had a wishlist of shows and movies that I wanted to watch but as soon as I start watching them, I get bored and feel like turning it off. No, its not the content No, its not the genre No, its not the actors No, its not the taste either This is pretty ironic as considering the fact that I have spent a fair share of my youth chasing academics and career, my heart had always craved for life experiences. I had to let go of the woman I loved simply because I was too focussed on my JEE. I wont be able to forgive myself for that EVER. It almost felt like I had lost a limb, without which , I would be rendered disfunctional. Thats a separate story tho. Nothing excites me (yep nothing) Nothing amuses me Nothing feels lively I have no clue where my life is headed I understand that as we age, our triggers of happiness change. I have put concious efforts into knowing what those new triggers are. But I cant find any plausible sources of happiness. I am performing pretty well with my career. Even got a double digit hike. But didnt feel that kick of joy. Have I approached a dead end?

I earn a decent living ~32LPA as a Software Engineer. I really enjoy my work and it is always a joy working with smart people around you. I sometimes wonder if I didn't exist would it matter in the world. At work, I come up with great ideas and insights which my peers appreciate and support, but there hasn't been one thing that they took seriously and moved ahead with. My peers around me constantly belittle me, some unprofessional jokes about my competence and intellect, even though I am actually good at what I do and more. The backhanded compliments and sarcastic replies in front of other people in my company makes me sad beyond belief. It is almost like I give so much of time to this company and although everyone cares about the work I do but no one cares about me. My colleagues constantly try to one-up themselves by bullying juniors and laughing in their glass-walled conference walls. Incidents like these make me want to give up on work. I think the mix of giving all of myself at work(intensity and long hours), constant berating on my competence and the time I spend away from my family and "real" friends(not these fake work colleagues) makes me depressed as fuck. I am now understanding that you can never be happy in life because you can never have all that you want. You will give up something for the other. You think making more money will make you happier but you will just end up losing your sanity.

Generally speaking, I'm a little less happier than I was 5-6 years back. Is this the case with you folks too? Or am I overthinking/getting depressed?

I have observed this( at least with my self) that whatever goals you set for your self ( X salary, Y net worth etc etc.) once you're there it becomes ordinary extremely fast and it starts feeling normal again and on you go towards the next milestone. I was wondering when does this end? Do any of you have reached a point where you don't have the lust for more? You're happy with what you have? Did you do something actively to make that mindset? Or were you a "satisfied with what you have" kind of a person all your life?

For me it was always startups and now looking at the landscape I think it’s very hard. For 8 years, I just wasted my time. Anything I am building is failing. Couldn’t raise any funds, non of my products reached mass market or gain enough profits. Have skills but non to utilise on! Indian B2C is extremely hard, and even though people think Saas is great, bad news guys, Indian business rather use excel than pay for jira. There is a saying now - “Easier to earn a dollar than a rupee”. Have meet so many founders and VCs. Most of them lost touch of reality. Either moved to US or on leave from their own startups. Only think I know is going through a complete mental breakdown and no one to look up to. My gf left last year, can’t even get any jobs in this market neither can build something useful.

Disclaimer: This post is not for self validation or to seek attention. Posting here strictly for advice as I believe many people here must have gone through this. I’m a final year student studying BTech in India. I have a foreign internship confirmed from Feb next year, and my current intern at a startup is ending at 30th November. I’ve been working at this startup for more than 2 years now, poured my heart and soul into it, but due to career growth decisions I had to leave it. With nothing to do for next 2 months, I have started slacking off from work even though I have 20 days left, which is bad. All work and no play since last 3 months have left me so burnt out that I have done less than 6 hours of coding in last 1 week. It’s eating me up from inside as I have a huge obligation to this startup, plus there is so much to learn, and I don’t want to start my career with such unprofessional behaviour. Instagram and YouTube shorts have ruined my attention span, mental energy and will to work, and it’s affecting my mental and physical health as well. I have tried multiple motivational videos, practices, tips and tricks, everything. They help for maximum of 2 days and then it’s again back to this. Even though I’m hugely interested in tech, learning, devops and programming… motivation is dead and my life feels ruined, especially after seeing all the achievements people are having in and around social media, linkedin etc. I just don’t know what to do to overcome this lazyness.

I think I'm losing my mind. I'm a 32-year-old guy in tech, graduated from IIIT Delhi, earning 78L annually, but I feel like I'm fooling everyone, including myself. It's as if I'm constantly waiting for someone to burst into the office and shout, "Hey, fraud! We've finally figured out you're actually useless!" I know it sounds like I'm humble-bragging, but trust me, I'm not. This feeling is eating me alive. Seven years ago, I started as a regular software engineer. Somehow, I kept getting promoted. Now I'm leading a team of 15 people, handling critical projects, and sitting in meetings with the higher-ups. But every time I'm in those meetings, I feel like a kid wearing his dad's oversized suit, pretending to be an adult. I work my ass off - late nights, weekends, you name it. But I always feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water. When my team comes to me with problems, I'm secretly panicking, thinking, "Why are you asking me? I'm as clueless as you!" The worst part? Everyone around me seems to think I'm some kind of wunderkind. My boss is always praising me in front of others. My team looks up to me. Even my parents are bragging about me to all our relatives. But inside, I'm constantly terrified that I'll make one tiny mistake and everyone will realize I'm a fraud. I see my college batchmates on LinkedIn, and they all seem so confident and successful. Meanwhile, I'm here, earning more than I ever thought I would, but feeling like I don't deserve any of it. I can't even enjoy my success. I bought a nice house last year, but instead of feeling proud, I keep thinking, "What if they fire me tomorrow? How will I pay for this?" It's like I'm waiting for everything to come crashing down. I know it's ridiculous to complain about a high-paying job when so many people are struggling. But this constant fear of being "found out" is driving me insane. I can't even talk to my friends about it because they'll probably think I'm just showing off. Has anyone else felt like this? How do you deal with feeling like a fraud when everyone thinks you're successful? Is this just part of adult life that no one talks about? This is what eats me alive during weekends, realised it's Friday and panic typed this here

Disclaimer: I have nothing against high earners in this group who are doing exceptionally well and earning big bucks at young age. You have my admiration. Target audience of this post: Everyone else who is doing okay in their job, earning an average salary for their age. Why have I posted it?: To not feel I am the only one who is a normal regular person doing just average in his life in this hyper competitive rat race. My thoughts: I clearly remember the moment, it was April 2007, I had barely completed the board exams of class 10th and joined class 11th. It was my first week into class 11th when a fine looking gentleman walked into our class to make us think of our future career path. He was from a coaching institute for IIT JEE and AIEEE. He told us about all the high salary packages at these premier institutes. I excitedly told my parents about it. Like any middle class parents, they dreamt of their son cracking the exam and securing good placements from IITs/NITs. They enrolled me in coaching. I worked hard for those 2 years, 11th and 12th. But what was harder was the constant stress and pressure I was put in, both intentionally and unintentionally. These ideas that 'I must crack JEE to have a good future', 'if you don't get through JEE then you are a waste' etc, were hammered into my mind day in and day out. I didn't crack JEE but got into a well reputed private engineering college of India.. Fast forward 4 years, did my MBA from tier 2 college only to join a service company at salary that would be considered too low for most of the folks here who compare salary like a plague. Recently joined a product company with good jump. Realised all that pressure I was put under in high school wasn't necessary. I am doing ok in life. I think it's okay to be earning an average salary, everyone of us is on his own journey of growth and comparing ourselves on basis of packages seems myopic Too much gyaan? Getting a perspective on late Saturday night!!!

Some background, I went to a T-1 school for my undergrad. Did many great internships and went to several hackathons around the globe. Made great money doing GSoC in my second year. I was the happiest back then. I was making more money than any of my friends, the world was for taking and I was Alexander, the world ripe for conquering. Fast forward to today and I think I have done a disservice to my potential. Even if I still am the pot-smoking liberal teen that I was, I feel that I could have taken extreme risks when I was young. I could have still gotten my current job easily. I hardly work more than 3-4 hours in a day. I am always wondering what to do with my time and it feels like life has stagnated with nothing to look forward to except how much money I can realistically make over time. I feel when I look in the mirror, I am still the same person I was. Except, I have lost some hair ofcourse and some hair has turned white(blame bangalore water ig?). Here is my advice to anyone young, hungry, smart and ambitious... You only miss the shots you never take. So take your chances and shoot your shots. No one cares about you as much as you do. So if you got one life, why wouldn't you make it the best movie that it can ever be? Ps: I am looking for new ideas to start my own new venture. If any VCs are interested in hearing my idea, you can reach out to me in DMs. I will share my Calendly there.