100%. I'm assuming you're younger because you're asking this question. But when life f$&ks you over, you grow as a person. This isn't a one time thing, you keep growing the more you live through difficult times. The clarity and strength you receive after it, is something no amount of books can teach you or money can buy. You become a "stronger" person because of it.

Yes, u r correct. I'm just starting my career. 
  
 What about second part "Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard" ?

Software Engineer

Communication

I don't know who G Michael Hopf is but that quote is dumb

Founder

Yeah, its true. Early developers had hard time making Byjus the learning App, which created good times when company started getting funding from left right and center. Because of good times company hired a bunch of weak Amazon EM’s promoted then as directors, VP at byjus. And weak men create Hard times !

Lawyer

True 100% look at the way the world is moving and the answer is blowing in the wind

"Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times." G. Michael Hopf  How much truth is in this quote?? Does it really apply in...

"Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times."- G. Michael Hopf

How much truth is in this quote??
Does it really apply in today's fast moving world ?

Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times.

Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times.- Grapevine

Not a meme though 🥲

Consultant

Saw a similar post somewhere from an European and I think it’s pretty valid for India.

For context, I am in my early 30s, a home owner, living in tier-2 city with a pretty high salary. Recently got married and my wife also works as an Enterprise AE for a listed US company. Our cost of living is pretty low given the house and tier-2 city. Even if we had a kid, the overall cost of living will not change a lot. 

I got to where I am, economically, by a combination of hard work and luck. Luck definitely was a huge part of it. Knowing the right people at the right time, working on the right technologies helped a lot more in advancing my career a lot more than grinding for good grades. Even the ability to buy a house without much debt, was partly because I was lucky to sell my shares in a fairly small startup. 

It would be easy to say things aren’t economically bad based on my own experience or that of my close friends. However, when I look at things more objectively, I can’t help but come to the conclusion that we are screwed as a generation. Except for maybe the top 1%, salaries are not keeping up even with inflation. Housing costs, specially in tier 1/2 cities are unbelievably high even if you want an average apartment. Jobs are no where to be seen. The whole generation is living in the hope of the stock market rally never ending. This seems completely unsustainable as a nation. I might be doing well for now, but I still recognise how these are real problems for most Indians, who’ve been waiting for India’s century for 20 years

Given that the services industry contributes more than 50% to the GDP, the current state of joblessness, the overall sluggishness in IT and related sectors, and the fundamental changes happening to the way IT services now work, I wouldn’t be surprised if we see a complete recession in the next 4-5 years.  

Lately, there has been a lot of criticism of anyone expressing anger on how bad things are but I think it’s helpful to talk about this.

Is it possible for those doing well to still acknowledge how our generation is screwed economically?

Great post, I was thinking to jot down something similar.     
 The way I see is that our generation(I'm Gen Z), is financially fucked due to 2 main behavioral changes:     
 1. Increase in consOOmerism: We're zoomer consoomer. GenZ is known for show off culture. We will buy the latest and greatest phones on EMI every 2 years. People spend thousands on sneakers, bags, branded clothes.     
 2. No Savings: People are no longer saving money. My then girlfriend used to got mad at me in market when I tried to bargain. Its considered a turn off lmao. People find bargaining bad now... like I'm looting a poor guy. People don't realise how much our parents sacrificed and bargained everyday to save money.

Welcome to Indian Startups's Private Community

I’ll start first: 

“The greats never sacrifice the important for the urgent. They handle the immediate problem and still make sure to secure the future.”

[Thread] Share one quote that stuck with you.

"The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed"

Product Manager

When i was in college i wanted to build my own company/product. Thought of many ideas and tried to build something. None of them worked and it affected my studies so I had to quit just to clear my exams.

After college I took placements in a WITCH like company where I got put into data entry/operations job after clearing difficult coding interviews (kismat kharab?). 
Somehow learnt new technologies on the side and managed to switch to a development role at a lower salary in a startup.

After 3 years Worked hard on DSA and (barely) managed to get a good offer with above average pay. But the company is not stable anymore and may layoff at any time. 
Right now struggling to learn enough DSA to crack any company.
Now I am almost 30, i have no hobbies,no talents, no relationships just trying to have a stable career.

I see people everywhere doing so many things at once. How do they manage to do this.
They are working at FAANG and managing businesses at the same time, have a bunch of friends.
What am I doing wrong?

Just a long rant about life

It is just luck + hardwork man. Work harder at everything and you will get there.

Growth Manager

Welcome to Software Engineers's Private Community

Do you agree?

The storm is not AI.  
 It's the uncountable number of fresh graduates standing behind you to do the same job.  
 But due to AI and online resources the gap between you and them is very small. 
  
 And companies have realised that they can always cull the herd and still an infinite number of near qualified people are ready to step in. 
  
 And it will slowly spiral to the bottom.

Thought's on this statement?

Yes, we should all work 70 hours a week so shareholders can make 70 millions a week and then at the first sign of trouble they can lay off 700 employees a week 😂

Sales

What is one of basic things you realised too late?

People don't talk to you when you are alone, they only talk to you when they are alone.

It's great that younger men are recognizing this as a problem. The solution becomes easier from here.

Read a report on senior couples: 60% of men consider their wives to be their best friends, while only 30% of women say the same for their husbands. Women tend to have more diverse relationships, with husbands, kids, extended family, and friends. This is one reason why you see widows managing life better than widowers. In couples married for 50 years or more, men often pass away soon after their wives.

Another example is when kids get into relationships or marry for love, their mothers often have adverse reactions. This can happen when fathers don't emotionally attend to the family (or don't know), and mothers become overly attached to their kids because that's their only source of attention and love.

In the Ranbir Kapoor x Nikhil Kamath podcast, Ranbir talks about his father's last days. Rishi Kapoor would come to him in tears, ruminating on his life and regrets. Ranbir had never seen his father like this and didn't know how to react.
Haven't you heard men say someone was crying and they didn't know how to help?

Men haven't seen emotions expressed openly, because at home, their fathers, "the breadwinners," couldn't slack off, admit mistakes, or show weakness. They don't know how to show love to their wives and kids, even if they love them deeply.

How can we change this pattern and raise a generation of men who are emotionally intelligent and expressive?

[Long Post] Not teaching men to express emotions has hurt society more than we realize

I used to work in a start up in Bangalore, they overhired in 2022 and overpaid the freshers, more than the experienced engineers were getting paid.
To fix this put 30% of workforce on pip, laid off 20% I was one of them. 2 months later, they did open layoffs, did it again in 2 months, and one of my friends there heard the founders cracking a laugh that even the investors wouldn't have expected us to do this so fast.

I joined another company, they lost the client I was hired for, and few more clients, I was told they will have to do layoffs and my name is in the list. So they asked me to resign and I refused by saying we'll consider a last working day, if I get an offer I'll resign otherwise anyway I'll have to be laid off and they agreed. This happened one month after I had joined this company ( also a startup ).


So, being laid off once was already a big enough punch of reality, with an education loan on my head.
I joined another company and got laid off again. Tough shit.


I ended up getting an offer before my lwd.
I am not from any IIT, I am not an exceptional engineer. I am very bad interviews, my resume usually doesn't get shortlisted.

Sheer volume of effort I put made the impact on me getting a job.
Right now I am the best job of my career, with a better management.


Trying to say, it's a tough time. But you'll get through it.

PIP then laid off, again laid off

Can relate op I got laid off twice last year. Got trauma because of that 💀. More power to you

Software Developer

Welcome to Confessions's Private Community

In my corporate experience, I have observed two kinds of leaders - 1) A hard task master, very high on IQ but more often than not low on EQ and 2) High on EQ, above avg on IQ. I as a manager/ leader fall under 2) and usually get work done without authority but I do experience at times, some peers and reportees taking advantage of my behaviour

 In my view, anecdotally I see type 1) leaders succeed more in corporates even if it comes at the cost of facing flak/hate from directs/indirects. One of my previous managers was unpopular for his toxicity but somehow I kind of built a decent bond with him. Once over drinks and dinner, he candidly told me, I'm not here in this organization for making friends and I'm here only to get results and he did deliver on results every year.

My question is, can type 2 leaders even climb up the ladder specially where cut throat competition exists. Sometimes I do feel I need to be more like type 1 leaders obviously not at the cost of toxicity - disrespect, shouting etc. 

What are your thoughts?

Task Master vs Empathetic leader

Program Manager

This is a rant post. Here is what is expected from a guy in India

- Study well, go to a great college.
- Get a high paying job.
- Marry at the right time or else all your achievements are a waste.
- Buy depreciating assets like car, houses etc
- Have kids at the right time.
- Give your kids the right upbringing.
- Take care of your parents. 
- Be part of the society 

Whereas, for girls all of the above do apply but are good to have things and not a must have.

If anything is missed from the above list, unfortunately society thinks you have not done the bare minimum.

Now my question is who has all of this sorted considering at whatever point of life they are in.

Why is life so hard for guys?

A Man has lot more responsibilities than women. Family, career, love. 

Why do Men mental health being so ignored. We don't share like women do but we are going through a lot. We are not expressive by nature. 

Our society shows so much love, respect to women why not same for MEN? Why aren't they treated equal?

What do you guys feel?

Why do our society don't value MEN MENTAL HEALTH?

Analyst

sometimes it gets tough, but we pull through 💪

Senior Software Engineer

A final year student

I made a lot of mistakes in my life
Never ever worked hard to my fullest potential
Didn't studied well even though I had potential during JEE
Keep getting attracted to girls(very few times), even though I am training myself not to.

Becoming emotionally down often
Feeling guilty of not being able to have someone to talk to.

What I simply want is to work to my fullest potential without getting attracted to the other gender so that there are no distractions and becoming mentally strong to the point that I don't need anyone else continuously present in my life for me.

There has to be a way
Almost everyone around me are so strong
My gut believes I don't have that much time left
I just want to fix everything for my parents and my brother
And leaving with a pride and honor of a MAN.

How to Forgive OneSelf?

Nice quote, only the one in the arena nowadays is the poor employee, who slogs it out, not sure of their job, and who can get fired just because the top management took some stupid decisions.

(I know Osho type question hai but just curious)

What is it about life that scares you at the moment?

Data engineer

When did we stop living? What are we chasing? Why did we make living so complex? Life used to be so simple. Why are so tensed and worried all the time? When will all this end ?

Life is complex...

When did we stop living? 
  
 The day we started prioritising 'log kya kahenge' over 'mera dil kya kehta hai'. 
  
 What are we chasing? 
  
 Materialistic possession, fame, acceptance, s**, recognition. 
  
 Why did we make living so complex? 
  
 Because of the desire for more and more. There is absolutely no end to it. People want to bring resources to Earth by mining moon, Mars, and asteroids. 
  
 Life used to be so simple. Why are so tensed and worried all the time? 
  
 Because we became part of the system and lost view of the world beyond it. Anything out of the box is shot down by people within the system and we feel discouraged and remain in the system. 
  
 When will all this end ? 
  
 Never. It's sad and cruel, but it will never end.

Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times.

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