Friday Mood

I feel my life is extremely difficult after demise of my beloved father at the age he should have not left us this early he was 51 and now without him my life is just extremely difficult in all aspects , people around me , relatives , career aspect marriage aspect future everything just scares me and i feel i cannot reach out to anyone for my help not even my mother with my problems I feel if i reach out to anyone they just shut it like dont overthink , please stop with your negativity I just dont know how to get on with life He was like shield to us Now i dont know even me , my mom , my sibling has changed like anything Nothing feels good anymore

I have been a little caught up with numerous things in my life lately and have finally found some free time to open up myself to new experiences. I had a wishlist of shows and movies that I wanted to watch but as soon as I start watching them, I get bored and feel like turning it off. No, its not the content No, its not the genre No, its not the actors No, its not the taste either This is pretty ironic as considering the fact that I have spent a fair share of my youth chasing academics and career, my heart had always craved for life experiences. I had to let go of the woman I loved simply because I was too focussed on my JEE. I wont be able to forgive myself for that EVER. It almost felt like I had lost a limb, without which , I would be rendered disfunctional. Thats a separate story tho. Nothing excites me (yep nothing) Nothing amuses me Nothing feels lively I have no clue where my life is headed I understand that as we age, our triggers of happiness change. I have put concious efforts into knowing what those new triggers are. But I cant find any plausible sources of happiness. I am performing pretty well with my career. Even got a double digit hike. But didnt feel that kick of joy. Have I approached a dead end?

I’m a very private person and I was a bit confused whether I should write here or not, but anyway. So, day before yesterday I was sitting on my chair after dinner and was thinking about my life and what the hell am I doing. I realised that, Saala bachpan se aaj tak race me hi bhaag raha hun. Pehle school me 1st, 2nd, 3rd aane ki race me. Then acche college milne ki race me. Then uske baad acchi job milne ki race me. Then uske baad agar ladki chahiye toh uske liye bhi ek race hai (Don’t have a gf, plz don’t take me wrong, it was a realisation) My current daily routine is like this: Wakeup everyday, write code, go gym, dinner, and then sleep and repeat this cycle everyday. School ke dost peeche chhoot gaye, college ke dost apni life me busy ho gaye, colleagues se main zyada baat nhi karta and main akela padh gaya. Feels like life is not intriguing anymore, it has no spark left. Its so painful to live everyday. I feel like I don’t want to live any more, I want to die but I can’t cuz of 2 reasons. 1. I’m the only son of my parents. 2. If I die like this, then I won’t be able to come out from the birth cycle. That’s it 🙏🏼

Has anyone thaught what's good and Bad?why shud we exist in first place? We all make money to live , to eat food , to find a family that we like it or not but forced to get used to it sometimes, work hard for money and then die someday , just like any other animals , what's the point of it . Why die someday after hard work and no enjoyment or die with enjoyment ? Why!!... Anyways noone's gonna remember me , you , or anyone in 100, 200, 1000 years... What's the purpose of living a life according to someone as good or bad ...why live in first place?... If we are born to die , then why be born? Work hard to get a good job , and then to get a good wife ? Do they work that way nowadays? Do you think that if you get rich and find a partner, is she attracted to you or to your riches? And at the end of the day everyone wants a beautiful person who is also rich and doesn't contradict with you..... And I am losing hopes in this generation, in this era , in this world and the entire humanity which is fading away , in the form of society we let humanity die, This world is not for humans alone but for animals also....but we never respect the dogs we see on roads , This world is not fair , and why shud we pretend to be good in an unfair world ? I don't believe in life after death anol, you are made of cells and they do decompose after you are burried and whatever consciousness is it's nothing but release of chemicals that creates an illusion..... And we all believe in that illusion....

Everyday when i wake up there is a feeling of emptiness or a sad feeling just by the thought of going to work..earlier i used to think this will get better with time but no it doesn't..has anyone went through the same situation?? how to cope up with this??

Just trying to understand the purpose or the motive of the people on GV that keeps you going by pushing yourself. I'm sure we've all been through a phase where this feels pointless, but still we keep at it.

Its been 3 months since I left my last company after completing 8 months of internship, I rejected the full time offer because I was exploited and work culture was very toxic, since then I applied to more than 100+ jobs online and hardly converted 5 interviews and got 1 offer for part time which is soon going to be revoked, assuming from the company's behaviour. At this point I have lost all the motivation to work, improve and apply for jobs I am tired and drowing in self doubt. It even kills me to see the people who are not skilled as I am are getting good jobs and salary. With all this my family is not so supportive and not a single day has passed where I didn't get into arguments with my parents.

It can be anything related to not doing something you always wanted to but never did, a mistake you realize you shouldn’t have made, or feelings of not being successful enough. Feel free to share your thoughts.

My current salary is 42LPA. I am from IIT, have 7 years of experience and work in product. Honestly, my value in the market is higher than what I’m being paid but I am very demotivated to optimise for that. When I do see less deserving people minting more money, I feel that I am doing injustice to myself and playing the wrong hand. More and more though, the thought of earning more money chokes me a bit. I have dreams of building something of my own - that gives me control to build something my way and freedom to live my life as per my terms. But the mindset of “zyada paisa pareshaani hai” doesn’t leave me. My family also is not dependent on me and whatever is needed from my side, I actively contribute to. I also lack any motivation to focus on my investments and see my money grow. I just have money sitting around in my bank account purely for nothing I also look at my lifestyle choices from time to time and go into existential debate of why we need the things that we do. This has come to a point where I really do not understand my relationship with money and why we earn and spend it. For me at this point, it’s just a show for the world. There’s very little that you need, and really no limit to what you want to show. And I just don’t see a point in it anymore.