Seen this trend 📈 going up in my frnds circle and few endup with legal troubles of getting physical in context of marriage . 
  
 A big red light flag 👍

Category Manager

I have read one article of investigative journalist (Linkedin) on cases of honey trapping and blackmailing. Just be very careful. That's all.

Founder

Reveal your GV username "Unused Inch" to her and she will run away  
  
 Tell her that you would like to use your inches for a better person whom you feel connected to, and not just to check compatibility.

Software Developer

Data engineer

Yes, don't get involved in this type of shit. If you still feel like beware of things that you communicate

Program Manager

Maybe she wants to know whether her sex life will going to be good or not. Kuch ladkiyan Karti hai bhai Aisa. Ignore and move on

Associate Product Manager

Tech Lead

In addition the girl is known of my relatives 😂, so she is not fake. But yeah it's clearly a red flag.

Software Engineer

Legally you can be in very deep shit if you entertain,you may be charged if you back out from marriage. There are laws for such. 
 Morally you now know the character of girl seeing the time period of communication

That you can decide, but beware if you pull out from marraige post being physical then she can make your life hell  because all the laws are against men. She has all the laws to protect her, but you have none.

Corporate Strategist

It reminds me of that movie scene Ginny one 
  
 https://youtu.be/o13nusxlahw?si=eLhl5ceFUn5UWlfM

Consultant

Product Designer

Girl from Jeevansathi.com asking to be physical before marriage. Is it a red flag?

Girl from Jeevansathi.com asking to be physical before marriage.
Is it a red flag?

Arrange Marriage

Arrange Marriage- Grapevine

I have been online on a lot of sites (shaadi.com, Bharatmatrimony etc) for 2 years now but it’s been really hard to get a guy.

There have not been many expectations, just a decently well educated guy who can talk with respect to ladies (I find it really hard to get guys of the latter, on these sites)

Those who were successful in arranged marriage, how did you do it? Any tips please. Should I pay some matchmakers? Suggestions are welcome.

How to find a hubby?

I doubt your expectation is just a well educated guy. There are hidden parameters u arent sharing. Or when the guy presents itself you are making some reason to not proceed

Engineering Manager

I don't know if this is the right forum to ask this question. How common is it to ask extremely personal questions to your potential partner, in an arranged marriage setting, before marriage?
For example, asking for a blood test report indicating tests done for STDs, sexual orientation,medical issues, criminal charges, personal debt, etc? 
One of my good friends(guy) was asked these questions by a woman's parents. He was caught off guard when the lady's parents asked these questions. He answered them though.
I request people who have had similar experiences to share their stories.

Asking Personal Questions before Marriage

Data Scientist

Welcome to Office Gossip's Private Community

“You should get married on time”

To the married folks, would it be different if you would have married later in life? From a personal or objective POV, what’s your take

32+ M here and not yet married.

“SHAADI waqt se ho jaana chahiye”

Got married at  26.  If i get  a time machine, will do it by 24.    There is a quote by ashneer, where he says, 30's are the most important time is building one's career and setting the foundation to make money. Distractions from family life/kids will kill both the careers and family. I think he made perfect sense.  

I think the older one gets, its difficult to have compatibility.  Too many external stimulus corrupts our view of the society. And more over everything has a purpose and we all come with a shelf life.  If chances of starting a family  is slim or nil, whats the point in getting married? one is better of single.

I am a 30 M , got married in 2020 and clearly the marriage was not working out. My wife and her mother was always finding ways to control me from the beginning with all the little things and my wife started this drama like with every fight she used to leave the house and stay at her mother’s and not comeback until all the parents gets involved and me asking sorry, one time she left the house because I cooked the curry and had asked her to do roti this turned into a fight and just for that she left the house. And her mother threatened me that she won’t send her daughter back until I ask sorry. There were LOT of these instances and at one point I really got fed up and started standing up for myself, in the last fight she said she won’t come back again and I said please don’t I am also tired of this. After a month she started reaching out to me asking sorry and apologies and all but I had lost all trust in the relationship and I wanted sometime. Even if I let her in her mother would have ruined the relationship again , so I asked her since I have no trust you have to agree on that in future if we get divorced if we have kids the kids stay with me and I won’t pay any alimony. Following this discussion she lodged a fake domestic violence and dowry case against me and my family. And I filed for divorce after I seeing police station and all. I have all the evidence to prove that I am innocent but the court is taking very very long time and now she is asking for for a huge amount only the she will agree for divorce 😣

Worst times for men! Better to be a monster than a hero

This has been dragging from past two years and am done with my life, I can’t date anyone even though am 30 I have maintained myself in a healthy way so that I look a bit younger but because of the case is still going on… I don’t know what to do

Got an offer from Matrimony, should I accept it? Culture,Maturity. Anyone?

Senior Product Designer

Seeking advice from married individuals who have/ want children

I’m 26 right now. Should I start looking for partners now or wait till around 30 once I’m financially stronger. Currently 22lpa - Mumbai

Marriage age for men

Growth Manager

The vision of working from scratch to build wealth has made so many families be in middle class
Dowry also pushed families from wealthy to working class
Raising kids as frustrated, tired individuals - Such a shitty arrangement imo

[Controversial] Parents' gen arrange marriages - Mom's father had money, our father had degrees

Welcome to Personal Finance's Private Community

My fiancé’s pay is 3x mine. And I feel guilty for not being able to scale up to a respectable pay or career advancement. This is my capacity - I am slow paced and a late bloomer in everything in my life. I feel like I don’t deserve a fiancé with 3x pay as mine and could find someone better than me as I was questioned by my fiancé about my career trajectory. I keep wondering in what way I can contribute my share once we settle. How will I do 50/50 because it doesn’t seem possible to do that. I will have to cut back on all my wants before things turn sour between us due to this financial imbalance. I don’t want money to get in the way of our relationship. I don’t know if anyone feels this guilty for not being able to contribute financially towards their married life. Or am I overthinking all this in my mind. It takes a hit at my self esteem when I see my friends/family around being able to achieve this financial equilibrium with their spouses. It makes me feel inadequate and not as empowered.

I feel guilty as my fiancé’s pay is 3x mine

When I got married, my partner’s pay was 2X mine. Cut to 8 years later, my pay is now 2.5X more than my partner. I am lucky to have a partner who never questioned me while my pay was lower than hers. So our relationship has been the same then and now.  
 Your pay cannot be the basis on which you decide if you have to be partners or not. If that is causing a rift between the both of you, you should perhaps have a honest conversation with your partner.

Founder’s Office

Analyst

What’s one advice you’d give to someone who’s starting the arranged marriage process?

Arranged marriage advice

Women of GV, what are the sexist rituals in your wedding that you don't want to do / didn't do?

Business Analyst

I have been in love with one girl double side, but now she told it wont happen we are different state and I am (gowda)my parents will kill you we can breakup there is no hope. After this I become emotionally so weak my heart feeling heavy. how can i come out from this pain. How can girls easily start avoiding boys even they loved so much.

Anyone have been in this situation, how you ppls come across this event.

I am tamil boy loving a kanada gowda girl.

Project Engineer

Let me start by listing mine
1. Get into shape 💪 - I’ve set a target weight for myself, and a target muscle mass and body fat percentage 
2. One book a month 📕 - This is something I’ve tried over and over but never seemed to achieve.
3. Delve deeper into devops 🔄
4. Complete a few side projects I’ve had in my backlog for months
5. Quit smoking 🚭

What are yours?

Grapeviners, what are your goals for 2024?

I have only one goal for 2024. 
  
 No. More. Procrastination.  
  
 It has ruined my life enough already. 🙄

A friend of mine was dating a girl, convinced his parents to offer marriage. But girl chickened out last minute, married one her father had chosen. This really fucked him up, he was determined to get married anyhow, whom didn't matter. 
1 Yr later, found a girl parents found, got pregnant before first anniversary. Over 3 years, their marriage has seen divorce, domestic violence and 5 star hotel celebrations (oscillated to extremes of good and bad)

I'm seeing another such case.
Office colleagues were dating, he proposed marriage, she declined. He said stuff that shouldn't have been said, she threatened POSH (did not complain officially)
2 months later, he has found someone to marry through arrange marriage route 

Break ups are bad, but half of the problem were you. Instead of working on that, people take it on ego

Rebound marriages are the worst

What are the few questions we should ask during marriage meetups ?

Project Manager

Fuck , what a waste of weekend.

story -

I am 27 years old and i am not rich enough like grapevine people. I earn 9 LPA and doing remote job. So parents started looking for girl for arrange marriage. So there is program arranged in our caste where boy and girl has to register beforehand. Registration fees is 500 per person and 400 for booklet. So i paid around 1900 and lunch is also included. This program invites all the prospects under one roof and booklet was given. Booklet has all the details of prospects.So registered candidates can have multiple meetings with different people. As you already guessed it this is problem of supply demand. Female candidates are way less and male candidates are way more. We have so many experiences like girl family just outright reject you on the basis where i live. That girl was doing nothing and have done  bcom. Also one girl family rejected us soon as we just sit for a meeting. Reason dad of female earns 4X than my father income. We had some meetings around 5-15 but hardly any positive response. Female family is able to do 20-25 meetings at  minimum and they can have choice whom to reject just on weight factor too. Shitshow out their for arrange marriage. We had a quarrel at home after coming from program that i wore some multicolour tshirt thats why we dont have further meeting. Also my parents are giving me lecture that i should have wore gold chain and bracelet to impress other people. 

another thing in booklet , boys has to mention salary. There is no mandatory thing to mention salary of girl in same booklet. Also girls are given return gift for just attending the function.

fair warning - rant on whole ecosystem of arrange marriage

It can be anything related to not doing something you always wanted to but never did, a mistake you realize you shouldn’t have made, or feelings of not being successful enough. Feel free to share your thoughts.

Do you have any regrets?

Failed to spend enough time with my parents. Life moves really fast. If you're around your parents take care of them, spend time with them and if you're away then make sure you visit them often ☮️

Here we go again...

Welcome to Indian Startups's Private Community

I am dating this girl for an arranged marriage setup, we have met multiple times(6-7 times) and almost all the time, i paid for it. She did not even attempt to pay or even ask for it. 

In another instance, she took me to a mud doll shop yesterday and I had no idea she was taking me there. She chose some mud doll which cost 2k and asked me to pay for it. 

It's really putting me off, is it normal or should I call it off???

Arrange Marriage

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